Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

The nice thing about wintertime is that it’s darker for longer, so you see a lot less people.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

If politicians can text my cell phone asking for money, I should be able to text them directly with policy suggestions.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Anytime a guy says “that’s what she said” always reply with “yeah, but not to you”.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

My Wi-Fi is stronger than my will to socialize.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

As a retiree, I have two pairs of pajamas. Bedtime and daytime. Sometimes I get them confused.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I think the worst part about the collapse of civilization will be all those people with no way to remove their braces.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

If someone asks you if you’re in the queue, what they actually mean is “you’re really shit at queuing, aren’t you?”

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Heavy on the ‘mhm,’ cause people just be talking.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

When I dance, people say it reminds them of a wild dog chasing its tail.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

It was the becestershire of times, it was the worcestershire of times.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,591

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

The same mosquito kept biting me last night. It probably thought it was at a wine tasting.

Making waves on YouTube:

The people who “don’t have time” and the people who “always find time” have the same amount of time.

Going viral on YouTube:

My wife is refusing to bring me a beer. That’s it, gonna text her and say “I cannot believe how lazy you are”.

Just shared via TikTok:

When I was a little girl, I always dreamed of growing up to satisfy user needs in a way that meets business goals for transformative outcomes.

Trending via TikTok:

Having leftover pizza for breakfast is an actual blessing.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

The show “How I Met Your Mother” was just a really long TED talk.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Pinky promises are still a legit foundation of trust.

Shared recently on Reddit:

So, does anyone know how to end mass religious psychosis, or is it just a thing now until we slowly die off from climate-induced disasters?

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I think my soulmate might be carbs.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

It’s funny we got universal near-perfect free translation, and the world didn’t really change at all.

There should be a website where you post your wishes, and rich people who don’t know what to do with their money give you an anonymous gift.

1 month ago

Witty text imagining a funny website where the wealthy anonymously gift wishes.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Wishing for a "Sugar Daddy Santa" website where dreams come true and funds mysteriously appear! 🎅💸✨

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

4 weeks ago

bag, cheese, comfort, comfort food, eat, eating, food, humor, indulgence, just, need, shredded, shredded cheese, snack, sometimes, straight
That’s me in the corner eating Nutella with a spoon.

1 month ago

activity, comfort, comfort food, corner, eating, food, humor, indulgence, me, Nutella, solo, solo activity, spoon
Hold on, let me overthink this.

3 weeks ago

decision, humor, let, me, overthink, procrastination, thought
Blocking people isn’t enough. I need their favorite TV show to get cancelled.

4 weeks ago

blocking, cancellation, cancelled, enough, entertainment, favorite, humor, i, media, need, people, revenge, show, social, social media, TV, TV Show
Coffee just tastes better when you are the only one awake in the morning.

4 weeks ago

alone, awake, better, beverage, caffeine, coffee, humor, just, morning, only, solitude
Mood to play music louder than my thoughts.

4 weeks ago

distraction, fun, louder, mood, music, play, thoughts

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

62 shares on Snapchat this month:

Nothing gets my heart pumping like receiving an annoying newsletter.

77 shares on X this month:

My self-care routine is mostly just going to Mexican restaurants.

30 shares on TikTok this month:

I think it’s clear that companies making medicine have no idea what fruits taste like.

75 shares on Instagram this month:

Is it okay for me to start drinking as soon as the kids are at school, or am I just a terrible teacher?

67 shares on Threads this month:

Whoever said, “Laughter is the best medicine,” clearly never tried Revenge.

48 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I eat cake every day because somewhere out there it’s someone’s birthday and I like to celebrate.

11 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you bought 1 Bitcoin ten years ago, it would now be worth 1 Bitcoin. Let that sink in.

17 shares on Telegram this month:

White Lotus is a cautionary tale about taking time off from work.

31 shares on WeChat this month:

There should be an Olympics where athletes can take as many drugs as they want. Like, to hell with y’all, let’s see how high humans can really jump.

71 shares on Discord this month:

I bought a robot vacuum today. Named it “Dustbin Bieber”.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

Why are they called “grammar Nazis” and not “the Gestypo”?

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

When I tell my kids I’ll do something in a minute, what I’m really saying is “Please forget.”

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Dear LOL, thanks for being there when I have nothing else to say.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Holding it together with duct tape and sarcasm.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Checked myself, but unfortunately, after I wrecked myself.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Sex is cool but have you ever had a king size bed all to yourself.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

I wonder if Mary and Joseph hated putting away the Christmas stuff as much as I do.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

I like my messages, how I like my nuts – MIXED.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I have a photographic memory, but I’ve run out of film.

Going viral on YouTube:

The greatest allies fascism and genocide have are the people who say, “I don’t follow the news, it’s too depressing.”

Just landed via Twitch:

Been whispering “I like invented her” about my newborn every few hours.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I’m sorry you had a bad experience at our restaurant. To make it up to you, here is a coupon for more of our terrible, terrible food.

Trending via Twitch:

It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.

Going bananas on YouTube:

I hate when I have dreams about work. I’m not getting paid to interact with these people on my time off!

Going bananas on Instagram:

If anyone needs me, I’ll be in this whirlpool of emotions over there.

Seen just now on Telegram:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

Going viral on Telegram:

Like me, the weather is getting cooler around here.

Making waves on Twitch:

It’s like winter is mad and keeps storming out, then coming back yelling ‘and another thing!’

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

There should be a website where you post your wishes, and rich people who don’t know what to do with their money give you an anonymous gift.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

That’s me in the corner eating Nutella with a spoon.

Hold on, let me overthink this.

Blocking people isn’t enough. I need their favorite TV show to get cancelled.

Coffee just tastes better when you are the only one awake in the morning.

Mood to play music louder than my thoughts.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨