They don’t put cars in malls anymore, like they used to.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

90% of parenting is wondering when you can lie down again.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

If you don’t want to be in love with me that’s fine. You’re entitled to your wrong and very stupid opinions.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Always remember, if you ever need me, I’m just several phone calls and unread texts away.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

If they stole your post, they probably need it more than you do.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

If a stranger starts talking to me in an elevator I say “I don’t want to talk in case we get stuck and I have to eat you” that usually shuts them up.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

I feel like I’m in jail when I’m around unfunny people for too long.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

My muffin top has become a full blown birthday cake.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

You ever liked a song so much you restart it before it even finishes?

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

I’m sorry, being on social media gave you the impression I’m a social person.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

I’ve never wished a man dead, but I’ve read some obituaries with great pleasure.