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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

Never quit, unless it’s too hard.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Robots eating a bowl of cereal that’s actually a bunch of nuts and bolts, you don’t see that as much anymore.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

I may regret the megabytes I’ve wasted, but I’ll never regret the megabites I’ve tasted.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

There are two quantities of popcorn: not enough and what have I done

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I can turn wine into water about two hours after drinking it. Checkmate Jesus.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Chickens only make one sound, because they can’t think outside the bawks.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

When life gives you lemons, give them back and ask what the crap is all about.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

If you bought 1 Bitcoin ten years ago, it would now be worth 1 Bitcoin. Let that sink in.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

It’s called a Caesar Salad because you stab it a bunch of times when you eat it.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

I hate when I lose things at work, like pens, papers, sanity and dreams.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

784 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,946

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,946

42 minutes ago

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Good news: I only ate one slice of pizza. Bad news: I did that four times in a row.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Pinky promises are still a legit foundation of trust.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

Just shared via Facebook:

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Being bilingual means stuttering in both languages.

Trending via Twitch:

Losing and then immediately gaining weight is my superpower.

Trending via Threads:

The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

Live now on TikTok:

I forgot to turn my clocks back and, oh my God, you guys are not going to believe the stuff that happens in the next hour.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Reading is a gateway drug to being less stupid.

They say every snowflake is different, as if someone actually checked them.

5 months ago

They say every snowflake is different, as if someone actually checked them.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the great snowflake mystery… 🤔❄️ Who's out there meticulously inspecting each flake for uniqueness, I wonder? Maybe a team of very dedicated tiny scientists armed with magnifying glasses! 🔍🔬 Or perhaps it's just Mother Nature's way of keeping us entertained! 🌬️😆 #SnowflakeInspector"

actually, check, different, every, humor, irony, joke, nature, observation, say, snowflake, someone

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

784 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,946

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,946

42 minutes ago

3,421

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

I often message people with the weird idea that they’ll message me back.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

I don’t understand how some people find love several times in their lives. I first have to find someone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

Sometimes a girl has to delete all the apps on her phone and not speak to anyone for a week to find true happiness.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

Onesies are amazing till you have to really pee in the middle of the night then you question all your life’s decisions.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

My goal weight is getting a magician to saw me in half.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

I’m at the age where drinking a cup of coffee now makes me feel like Popeye scarfing down a can of spinach.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

“I asked Grok.” “I asked ChatGPT.” Well, I’ve sacrificed a sheep.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

Me at war: You guys mind if I leave a bit early today?

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

That moment of panic when they invite you inside at the start of the birthday party you thought was a drop off.

Just landed via Messenger:

I’m staying up past midnight this New Year’s eve. Not to welcome the new year, but to make sure this one is over.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

For years I thought an oncologist was just the doctor they kept on-call at all times.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

It’s called the Summer Olympics so one of the events should be running in flip flops to catch the ice cream man.

Reported on Telegram:

When I was young, I couldn’t wait to be older. Well, I wasn’t expecting this shit!

Broadcasted on Threads:

An Advent Calendar for adults but behind every door is a different kind of anxiety medication.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.

Just landed via Discord:

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.

Going viral on Snapchat:

You’re a “haha” girl, and I’m an “lol” guy. It just wouldn’t work.

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