“You’re an athlete,” I whisper to myself, as I begin my third attempt to get out of the couch. Posted on3 months ago3 months ago by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image Commentary:"When getting off the couch feels like an Olympic sport, but your medal is just chips! 🥇🍟 #Couchlete" Related Funny Quotes 🤝 I made a clone of myself to do the dishes, another to do the laundry, and another to do the cooking, but we’re all sitting on the couch watching TV. Sure, I could get off the couch today, but then what? “Still gangsta” I whisper to myself as I drink my chamomile tea with a heating pad on my back. “Thug life,” I whisper to myself as I check out my sunglasses in the mirror. Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.