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Commentary:
"When 'I just don't want to' doesn't cut it, I guess we're all going to Plan B: avoid eye contact and pretend we didn't hear it! 🙈🤷‍♂️😂"

absence, apparently, boss, coming, excuse, honesty, humor, i, just, reason, today, unemployment, want, why, work, workplace

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

It’s funny we got universal near-perfect free translation, and the world didn’t really change at all.

0

3 days ago

change, communication, free, Funny, got, humor, irony, language, technology, translation, universal, world
Uninstalling Instagram can increase your IQ by 10%.

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2 months ago

humor, increase, Instagram, intelligence, IQ, media, social, social media, technology, uninstall
Can y’all just post your therapist’s advice in the comments so I don’t have to go?

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2 months ago

advice, comments, humor, i, just, media, post, social, social media, therapist
It’s cute when kids say what they want to be when they grow up. You’re gonna write emails on the computer, buddy.

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2 months ago

aspirations, computer, cute, emails, grow, grow up, humor, kids, say, want
If you start a sentence with “Let me reiterate…”, I’m gonna ignore it the second time too.

0

2 months ago

communication, humor, ignore, let, me, reiterate, repetition, sarcasm, second, sentence, start, time, too
Asking for a donation like Wikipedia every time someone asks me a question.

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2 months ago

asking, donation, every, humor, me, question, request, sarcasm, someone, time, Wikipedia

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

34 shares on WeChat this month:

Imagine being social on social media.

10 shares on TikTok this month:

One day you’re 18 eating pizza for every lunch, then suddenly you’re 30 and eating salad with celery and kale juice.

51 shares on LinkedIn this month:

How do you politely tell someone that they ruined your life?

62 shares on Messenger this month:

Getting a random boner is a bit funny. Like, what is it, boy? What do you see?

43 shares on Twitch this month:

I may be the reason why our kids are ugly, but you’re the reason why they’re stupid.

87 shares on Reddit this month:

In a relationship with my heated car seat.

64 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Straighten your back and drink some water, you dehydrated banana.

51 shares on Snapchat this month:

Doesn’t matter if the chicken or the egg came first. Still a weird thing to just appear.

77 shares on Discord this month:

Hell, yes, I work out. Somebody has to support the ibuprofen industry.

75 shares on Slack this month:

Don’t think my brain is braining properly today.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

You’re the human embodiment of an “ugh.”

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

It’s funny how quickly you become difficult if you don’t always just say “yes”.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

Not feeling fergalicious today, actually feeling pretty fergusting right now.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Wooden pews are designed to maximize the shame of farting in church.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Don’t ring my doorbell unless you’re accompanied by a camera crew and holding balloons and a big check.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Everyone is always talking about raising money for dogs without homes, but what about the ones who don’t have cars?

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

Dating profiles should make you share a sound bite of you sneezing.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

“PTO” stands for “prepare the others” because you’re not gonna be there.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

I thought you are the sunshine of my life, but you are just a meteor trying to destroy my world.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Welcome to the internet, where people are confidently wrong all the time.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Notice how ghosts never wear fitted sheets?

Live now on Twitch:

Welcome to social media. A person who does not understand humor will contact you shortly.

Going bananas on Discord:

There needs to be a separate grocery store for people who actually know what they’re doing.

Going bananas on X:

If onion powder is dehydrated onions blitzed into powder, how much onion powder would I need to consume to have eaten a whole onion?

Just shared via Slack:

Handsome, you better get to the point, my beer buzz is starting to wear off.

Spotted on Slack:

My kids think I’m going to miss them when they leave for college, but I’ll be busy drinking my coffee while it’s still hot.

Going viral on Instagram:

I dreamt this night that I had died and when I woke up, a piece of me was actually already stiff.

Making waves on Reddit:

I get tired from just thinking of everything I have to do.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Unemployed folks always have esoteric knowledge, for some reason.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Apparently, “I just don’t want to” is not a valid reason when your boss asks you why you’re not coming in today.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

It’s funny we got universal near-perfect free translation, and the world didn’t really change at all.

Uninstalling Instagram can increase your IQ by 10%.

Can y’all just post your therapist’s advice in the comments so I don’t have to go?

It’s cute when kids say what they want to be when they grow up. You’re gonna write emails on the computer, buddy.

If you start a sentence with “Let me reiterate…”, I’m gonna ignore it the second time too.

Asking for a donation like Wikipedia every time someone asks me a question.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨