Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
🤣 Sure, just be prepared to leave a part of yourself behind for posterity! 🐾 Who needs a fancy rug when you've got a friend like me shedding everywhere, right? 🙈 #FriendshipGoals #PetHairEverywhere

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.

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2 months ago

80s, drink, feeling, humor, nostalgia, retro, thirsty, waterbed, woke
I hate starting new relationships. I gotta act like I ain’t crazy for two months.

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2 months ago

act, crazy, dating, hate, i, month, months, new, relationship, relationships, start
THRILLED to announce I did an Ironman this weekend! Attended 3 social gatherings in 3 days.

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2 months ago

3, achievement, activity, announce, announcement, celebration, days, event, fun, fun activity, gathering, gatherings, i, Ironman, social, social gathering, thrill, thrilled, weekend
Men will ruin your whole life and come back and like your Instagram story.

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2 months ago

back, heartbreak, humor, Instagram, life, media, men, relationships, ruin, social, social media, story, whole
The little umbrella is so unnecessary. Like, my drink is already wet, bro.

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2 months ago

bro, context, drink, humor, little, umbrella, unnecessary, wet
I thought there was a spider on the rug but it was just yarn. It’s dead yarn now though.

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2 months ago

dead, funny observation, humor, i, just, mistake, observation, rug, spider, thought, yarn

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

29 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The dumbest thing about YouTube ads is how they seem to think that I’m a moron.

18 shares on Threads this month:

I was googling the best time to visit Italy. It is when you have money.

54 shares on Messenger this month:

In an effort to keep our house clean before Thanksgiving, I’ve asked my family to go live somewhere else.

97 shares on Twitch this month:

You should always wear a helmet when doing dangerous things or talking about politics.

69 shares on Instagram this month:

I hate commas. It’s not my job to tell you when you breathe. Work it out, you’re a grown adult.

13 shares on Slack this month:

Waitress: “Do you have any questions about the menu?” Me: “What kind of font is this?

26 shares on Discord this month:

Remember when the FBI would threaten you at the beginning of every VHS tape? That was pretty cool.

56 shares on Telegram this month:

For Christmas, I’d like to figure it all out.

77 shares on Twitch this month:

Grown men carpooling to the strip club so they can get boners and drive home together.

41 shares on WeChat this month:

“A healthy lifestyle is all about balance,” I say as I drive through Taco Bell after working out.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

If a beer is 8 bucks, it’s a show. If a beer is 14 bucks, it’s a concert.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

Clearing her mind with a brisk walk along the foggy shoreline.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Together, I can beat schizophrenia.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

Wife bought something on FB Marketplace, but she’s afraid she’ll get kidnapped, so she sends me to pick it up from a guy whose wife sent him because she’s afraid to get kidnapped.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

First date idea: we search for each other’s criminal history together.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

You have been a very bad boy. Now go to my room!

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

If three ghosts visited me on Christmas, I’d make them play Mario Party with me.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Lovingly looking at my dog knowing I’m about to ruin her day with a bath.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

Your in his DMs, I’m on Etsy paying a witch to put a spell on him.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Can someone call my keys? I forgot where I put them.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Sorry I didn’t text you back, I was pretending I didn’t see it and ended up actually forgetting.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

My kids practically have medical degrees they’re at the nurse so much.

Trending via WeChat:

My chess strategy is eating one of your pieces every time you look away.

Going viral on Facebook:

Oh, to live in an apartment alone and do whatever I want.

Shared recently on Reddit:

If you take a social media sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last post something fun like “I wonder if there’s a bear in this cave?”

Trending via Snapchat:

Don’t ruin a good sundress by wearing panties.

Just shared via X:

Friends with benefits, but it’s just that they make delicious baked goods.

Making waves on Threads:

I’m shocked it offended you, I was certain someone was gonna need to explain it to you.

Going viral on Snapchat:

When people are telling me a story about their life it often reminds me of a much better story from my life.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

They should build a separate grocery store for people who have actually purchased food before, know how to push a cart, and possess at least an ounce of spatial awareness.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Can I come over and shed hair everywhere?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.

I hate starting new relationships. I gotta act like I ain’t crazy for two months.

THRILLED to announce I did an Ironman this weekend! Attended 3 social gatherings in 3 days.

Men will ruin your whole life and come back and like your Instagram story.

The little umbrella is so unnecessary. Like, my drink is already wet, bro.

I thought there was a spider on the rug but it was just yarn. It’s dead yarn now though.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨