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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡น has downloaded:

Distance is my jam; solitude is my peanut butter.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ฌ has viewed:

I’m so old and have never even met a woman named Jolene. I’d really like to find her, though. She can have my man.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ญ has downloaded:

IP address? You mean the bathroom?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

My future husband and I will be stay-at-home parents, and the kids will go to work.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฎ has copied:

IKEA assembly instructions should come with a glossary of Swedish swear words.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ญ has viewed:

I will never forget when my dad had a guy from Verizon call me in middle school to tell me that I was using more data than Obama and that I need to stop.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has downloaded:

It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and donโ€™t have the humidity to admit it.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,618

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Going bananas on Instagram:

Forget pheromones, barbecue smells are always attractive.

Making waves on Slack:

I am a friend to all cats. Yes, even the mean ones. They have their reasons.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I was telling my sister that I’ve been going to the gym recently, and my nephew said, “You should go inside when you get there,” and I don’t think I’ll ever recover from that.

Making waves on Messenger:

I need an Apple Watch that tracks when my patience runs out.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I decided to be me and now we have a problem.

Spotted on Messenger:

I’m sorry I roasted you, I was trying to flirt.

Just landed via X:

After an hour on this team meeting Iโ€™m not wanting to be a team player anymore.

For whom the doom scrolls!

For whom the doom scrolls!
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Commentary:
"Ah, the elusive seekers of the ancient scrolls! ๐Ÿง™โ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ”ฎ Who dare to decipher the cryptic messages of destiny… or just end up getting zapped by an unexpected curse! โšก๏ธ๐Ÿ’€ Remember, not all scrolls lead to treasure chests! ๐Ÿ—๏ธ๐Ÿ˜…"

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Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,841

Funny Quotes of the Month ๐Ÿš€

Funny Quotes of the Year โญ

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ธ has viewed:

Bro, did you seriously just forget about Dre?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has bookmarked:

If pigeons and chickens made a tribe, would they be called the coo clucks clan?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ถ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has downloaded:

Does anyone know if there’s a career in being a piece of shit?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฉ has viewed:

(guy who’s not even that into you) I love you.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡บ has downloaded:

Please make sure you are only drinking as much water as you REALLY need. We need that for the data centers. If you’re thirsty, AI is thirsty too.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ช has copied:

The tarot lady on my TikTok said that you miss me.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

What if all the ancient Greek sculptures are actually victims of Medusa?

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Going viral on Threads:

You guys know your secrets are safe with me. Itโ€™s the people I share them with you can’t trust.

Just shared via WeChat:

Why can’t you just be happy for me and then go home and talk behind my back later like a normal person?

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Some people donโ€™t have a permanent handwriting. It depends on their mood and the pen they use.

Going viral on X:

Kinda rude my neighbors live next to me.

Just shared via Discord:

Washing machine minutes are not the same as regular minutes.

Going viral on Facebook:

Twitter is basically a psychiatric ward where all the patients diagnose each other.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine youโ€™re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

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