Commentary:
Is leaving their number on a missing persons report still too much? 📞🤔❤️
50 Funny act quotes
I say “long story short,” and suddenly we’re in Act III with an intermission.
Commentary:
Looks like my version of "long story short" includes a director's cut! 🎬😂📚
Sometimes I’ll do a random act of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.
Commentary:
Silence is golden, and I'm basically Fort Knox! 😂🤐💰
A man will beg you to take him back just to act right for 5 days and 24 min.
Commentary:
Sounds like he's got a 5-day free trial, but forgot to cancel the subscription! 😂⏳
Trying to bribe Monday with coffee to get it to act like a Friday.
Commentary:
Looks like Monday needs an espresso intervention to get its act together 🤔☕️➡️🎉
The final act of love is not texting them happy birthday.
Commentary:
Why send a text when you can send smoke signals and ensure everyone knows about your forgetfulness? 🎉🔥📵
Boys say that girls are dramatic, but have you ever plucked a man’s eyebrow? They act like they’ve been shot.
Commentary:
Eyebrow plucking: the ultimate test of male courage! 😂👨🦲🏹
I’ve mastered farting, and it be loud and quick, but the key is don’t make a face or look around, so people can’t pinpoint it to you. Just act natural.
Commentary:
Silent but not-so-deadly detective work in progress! 😆🕵️♂️💨
To quote Hamlet Act III, Scene III, Line 92 “No.”
Commentary:
When Shakespeare predicted every multiple-choice test ever given, he was onto something 🎭😂✏️
I will not accept a hint. I will act dumb until you say it clearly to me.
Commentary:
When it comes to hints, I'm on a strict see-no-clue diet. 🙈🤷♂️🔍