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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

I wish I were a wild horse in Kazakhstan. That would fix everything.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Sorry, I liked your post one second after you posted it but in my defense, I’ve had my phone in my hand since 2012.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Microdosing Christmas by being present.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

My signature move is waving at someone who is waving at the person behind me.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Ping me if your boobs glow in the dark.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Why procrastinate now when you can always procrastinate later?

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

I do block people right away; you’re not going to stress me out on my own phone, with my own internet, and in my own house.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Being an adult is crazy. Because what the hell is going on?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

Lost my Thesaurus. Gutted. Really gutted. Like absolutely gutted.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,453

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Twitch:

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.

Shared recently on Slack:

Nobody calls you old more than people 2 years younger than you.

Just shared via Instagram:

I can’t even think straight knowing a package got delivered while I’m not home.

Live now on Slack:

Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

Making waves on Instagram:

Think I’ll get high enough to find out if there’s a God. Stay tuned.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Hyphenated. Non-hyphenated. The irony.

Spotted on Snapchat:

We were supposed to have flying cars and other cool stuff, but instead we have AI videos showing Michael Jackson eat at McDonald’s.

Trending via WhatsApp:

You’d think the heat and humidity would steam some of the wrinkles out of my body.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

My favorite thing to do is nothing, with no one.

Just landed via Messenger:

They give smokers all those breaks to make up for the time taken off their lifespan.

Funny Adam quotes

Funny Adam quotes bring a burst of laughter and good vibes to your day 😂✨ Whether you’re looking for clever wit or silly moments, these gems from Adam never fail to crack us up 🤣🎉 Perfect for sharing with friends or brightening your feed, get ready to smile and maybe even snort a little! 😜🌟 Dive in and let the fun begin!

New funny Adam quotes 👇

There’s no better feeling than coming home and immediately changing into your Adam Sandler fit.

0

2 weeks ago

Adam, Adam Sandler, better, change, change clothes, changing, clothes, comfort, coming, feeling, fit, home, outfit, relaxation, sandler
If God had known what mankind would turn into, he would have sterilized Adam.

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2 months ago

Adam, creation, God, humor, irony, mankind, religion, sterilization, turn
Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

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2 months ago

Adam, babysitter, biblical, eve, even, humor, i, irony, parenting, sometimes, think
The history of mankind would have been completely different if Adam and Eve had been Chinese. They would have left the apple hanging and eaten the snake.

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2 months ago

Adam, apple, Chinese, culture, different, eve, food, history, humor, irony, left, snake
Vibrators are wrong and unnatural. The Bible said Adam and Eve, not Florence and the Machine.

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2 months ago

Adam, bible, eve, florence, Florence and the Machine, humor, machine, music, religion, said, sexuality, unnatural, vibrator, wordplay, wrong
“I have an AI boyfriend.” No, you don’t. It’s Adam and Eve or Adam and Steve, not Adam and USB.

0

5 months ago

Adam, Adam and Eve, Adam and Steve, AI, boyfriend, dating, eve, gender, humor, i, relationship, steve, technology, USB
I love when I come home, I put on my Adam Sandler clothes.

0

5 months ago

Adam, Adam Sandler, celebrity, clothes, clothing, comfort, home, humor, i, love, outfit, put, sandler

All funny Adam quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on Slack this month:

Man, you really don’t appreciate not having something in your eye until you have something in your eye.

60 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you can reach enlightenment, can you also reach endarkenment?

93 shares on Facebook this month:

I bet the kids in Mrs. Doubtfire were surprised when found out their nanny was famous actor Robin Williams the whole time.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Blink if you want me!

74 shares on Facebook this month:

A college education is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

50 shares on WeChat this month:

Everyone thinks they will be the first person in history to maintain their dignity while posting online.

64 shares on YouTube this month:

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I love when I see a really beautiful car, and I look inside, and it’s a beautiful woman. That’s fire.

56 shares on Snapchat this month:

Beginning my getting out of bed journey this morning.

25 shares on Slack this month:

Sorry, I can’t go out this weekend. I went out last weekend, and I’m still recovering from that.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I get it, laundry, no one is doing me either.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I learned Morse code, and then I couldn’t sleep because the rain kept telling me to go fuck myself.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I have some fart jokes I’ve been holding in.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Coffee doesn’t even make me feel energized, I just drink it for the love of the game.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Excuse me sir, are you going to finish that existential crisis?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Kids be like, I see you have a moment to yourself, and I must correct that immediately.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s not too early to go to sleep. Too early only applies to waking up.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Attention to detail is so sexy, study me, baby.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

So you like bad boys? Cause I’m bad at everything.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to kiss today.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,291

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

Girl, he’s nonchalant because he doesn’t like you. He’s definitely chalanting somewhere else.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Dear Math, I don’t want to solve your problem, I have my own problems to solve.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

I don’t like people who take drugs, for example: airport security.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

Dude, we’re biting off more than we can chew tonight if you want to pull up.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Why do people always assume it’s a compliment when I tell them their baby looks just like them?

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I’m already spoiled… please don’t come into my life trying to unspoil me.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

“I can’t possibly lose this if I put it here” I say to myself before completely forgetting where here is.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to a happy life.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately, I will continue to get sexier and funnier.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

When they know you know they did you dirty, they stay gone. And that’s the best thing.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

I’ve never been kissed under the cameltoe or whatever it’s called.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. It can’t just be the one guy. It’s gotta be a group of people pooping my son’s diaper.

Seen just now on X:

I survived a Monday, and for what? Tuesday? Disgusting.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I’ve never seen anything sadder than me in a black cape under the salon lights with wet hair parted incorrectly by a solid inch.

Going viral on X:

It’s Friday. I ran out of small talk on Tuesday. Please leave me alone.

Spotted on Slack:

Vibrators are wrong and unnatural. The Bible said Adam and Eve, not Florence and the Machine.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I wanna be a villain so I can just saunter everywhere. The heroes are always sprinting, always running. You ever seen Darth Vader run? Hell no. And I ain’t about to either.

Just landed via Pinterest:

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.

Making waves on Twitch:

“You live and you learn!” Bro, I don’t want to do either of those things.

Live now on Twitch:

Men: Masters of multitasking – can watch sports, ignore laundry, and forget your birthday, all at once.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴