Funny biblical quotes

• So, technically, Moses is the first man to download files from the cloud using a tablet.

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• Sex before marriage is a sin unless you do it doggy style, because all dogs go to heaven. Follow me for more biblical loopholes.

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• God: “I don’t regret the Flood, but I do regret the Ark.”

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  ark, biblical, creation, divine, Flood, God, humor, i, irony, joke, regret

• Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

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• If I were Noah, I’d bring three of every animal just to create some drama.

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• Biblical loophole: It’s not premarital sex if you never intend to get married.

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• I’m gonna start cursing people out but with biblical phrases like I hope your crops wither and bear no fruit and the ravens eat your mustard seeds.

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• When I look at the world, I realize why Noah only took animals with him.

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  animals, biblical, humor, i, Noah, perspective, realize, wisdom, world

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