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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

God, I was so happy when I was 18. I wasn’t at the time, but in retrospect I was.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

If you want to make God laugh, inhale some helium then tell Him your plans.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

The problem with expensive things is that you tend to want them.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

The laundromat should give you XP and ranks like “Slimelord” and “Glunkfather,” based on how dirty your clothes are.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

I embarrass myself in front of myself.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Everyone thinks they’re brave right up until a goose starts chasing them.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

If we breakup because you “wanna focus on school,” I better see you in Harvard.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

I heard time is money, so I quit my job. Now I have lots of time!

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Oh I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Y’all screenshot payment confirmations to make sure they don’t play with y’all too?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,567

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Snapchat:

Sorry for acting weird, I am weird, and it will happen again.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Not my circus, but I’ve grown quite fond of its monkeys.

Freshly posted on Slack:

When I grow up, I’d like to be a retired lottery winner.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I’ve done the math: If the month had 10 days, I would get by with my money.

Breaking via Instagram:

Who needs therapy when you can gaslight yourself into thinking that everything is fine?

Spotted on Discord:

People can’t drive you crazy if you don’t give them the keys.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I try not to post too much, to give everyone else a better chance at being seen.

Shared recently on X:

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I’d have to do.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

None of this is happening. It’s all in your phone.

Trending via Instagram:

Who called them sea lions and not soggy doggies?

Funny defiance quotes

Funny defiance quotes bring a cheeky twist to standing your ground 😎🔥 They blend wit and rebellion, making it impossible not to smile while sticking to your guns 💥😂 Perfect for those moments when you want to say no with style and sass 😏✨ Ready to laugh and defy? Let’s dive into some hilarious words of boldness! 🎉💬

New funny defiance quotes 👇

Show me another rule so I can break that one too.

0

2 months ago

another, attitude, break, defiance, humor, i, me, nonconformity, rebellion, rule, rule-breaking, show, too
My computer: Consider changing your password. Me: Consider fighting me in the streets.

0

2 months ago

changing, computer, consider, defiance, fight, fighting, humor, me, password, sarcasm, street, street fight, streets, technology
To be gentle in this world is an act of rebellion.

0

4 months ago

act, courage, defiance, gentle, kindness, rebellion, world
I’m not worried about shattering the illusion, I want to smash it to pieces.

0

5 months ago

attitude, defiance, humor, i, illusion, pieces, shattering, smash, smashing, want

All funny defiance quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

61 shares on TikTok this month:

When society eventually breaks down and we are left to rebuild civilization, I hope there are people who still know how to make cheese.

95 shares on Threads this month:

Scams used to be like “free money!” and now they’re like “hello, we have a job for you”, which seems to be a bad sign.

95 shares on WeChat this month:

So, Earth is basically auditions for heaven and hell.

33 shares on Pinterest this month:

I know life can be tough, but you still gotta wear deodorant.

73 shares on Snapchat this month:

When you wish you could tell someone that won’t stop talking “Okay, we’re out of time today”, just like a therapist.

100 shares on Twitch this month:

I once had a psychic girlfriend, she left me before we met.

79 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Adult friendships are difficult. The people I get on best with never want to leave the house either.

75 shares on Slack this month:

Adulthood these days is just bills and running out of memory on devices.

14 shares on Discord this month:

Jesus Christ. I haven’t seen a meltdown like that since Chernobyl.

33 shares on Reddit this month:

Nothing like waking up on a Friday and finding out it’s Tuesday.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Tears for Fears: Everybody wants to rule the world. Me: Some of us just want eight hours of uninterrupted sleep.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Born to be quiet and mysterious, forced to yap whenever I get the chance.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

“Boy, you made these perimenopausal ovaries come back to life,” – me flirting.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

New challenge called “don’t say ‘wow it’s already dark by five these days’ for the rest of winter”

14 folks are currently checking 👀

People say “go big or go home” like going home is a bad thing. Heck yeah, I want to go home, and I’ll have a nap when I get there.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 40s. “I’m too old for this shit” is now your excuse and explanation for everything.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’d be less aggressive in the morning if I could drive to work in a tank.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Aside from cocaine, has anyone figured out what that little pocket on your jeans is for?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,256

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Life hack: You don’t need white noise to sleep when you have constant ringing in your ears.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

The feelings I have for Tom Cruise are the closest approximation I have to what patriotism must feel like.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

“Autophagy” would be a beautiful name for a girl.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

I was in Paris with a boyfriend once and he lit a candle in Notre Dame in order to ask God to raise the price of Bitcoin.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

The only running I do is to chase the ice cream truck.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

I’m that person who will restart a song because I got distracted and wasn’t appreciating it enough.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Before we become friends, could you please sign this NDA.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

I’m like a semicolon, most people don’t know what to do with me.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

According to my chocolate advent calendar, tomorrow is Christmas.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

Just shared via Instagram:

It’s scary when the washing machine spins really fast.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Your girlfriend needs two hours to get ready. But if you don’t have your shoes on when she’s ready, you’re the problem.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

“I’m fluent in creating worst-case scenarios in my head.”

Trending via Facebook:

I don’t mind pulling your cart — I’ve been chasing the carrot anyway, and it’s in the same direction.

Just shared via WeChat:

When you realize your punishments as a kid (stay home, take a nap, no junk food, go to bed early) are now your goals as an adult.

Just shared via Snapchat:

People who like sweet potato fries can’t be taken seriously and deserve shame and ridicule.

Breaking via Instagram:

The ultimate student paradox: skipping class to avoid stress, only to stress about skipping class!

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

If I was the inventor of healing, I would have made it linear, I can tell you that much.

Just landed via Facebook:

Blocking me is like blocking the sun, the moon and the stars.

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