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New funny quotes: 6 this month

15,831 funny quotes and pics

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Updated: Jun 2, 2026

 

 

 

 

 

114 Funny mind quotes

Funny mind quotes 🤯😂 are the perfect brain ticklers, ready to turn your cerebral chaos into giggles. Dive into a world where neurons play hopscotch, and wisdom wears a clown nose! Whether you’re outsmarting your own thoughts or just looking for a mental chuckle, these quotes will have your gray matter doing a happy dance! Get ready to think and laugh simultaneously—because who says you can’t multitask with humor? 🎉🧠

Great minds think alike, but so do stupid ones.

Posted onMay 22, 2026

If you’re going to stare all night and not say hello, do you mind taking your fingers and squishing my head from across the room?

Posted onMay 21, 2026

When the client says: “make it pop”, I have to ask myself whether he means my mind or the project.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

I went to a mind reader. She almost went mad.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

I wonder how much this “Never mind, it’s only 10 bucks” has already cost me?

Posted onMay 21, 2026

If I had today’s mind, I wouldn’t have made yesterday’s mistake. But if I hadn’t made yesterday’s mistake, I wouldn’t have today’s mind.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

Here’s a question for all the mind readers out there.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

Human interaction is a great way to learn all the new swear words your subconscious mind has come up with in the lab.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

I would like to have the peace of mind of a cow. I already have the body.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

Changing your mind is an underrated activity.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

“Out of sight, out of mind” doesn’t work for donuts.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

If dogs ever learn to talk, I want everyone to keep in mind that mine is a big fat liar.

Posted onMay 21, 2026

Got my mind on my money and my money is nowhere to be found.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

If I would’ve known that you were going to ask me what I was thinking, I wouldn’t have been thinking what I was thinking.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

I don’t mind driving in bad weather. I mind other people driving in bad weather.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

I didn’t really mind the voices in my head until one of them started their own podcast.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

Cicadas are all like, “Y’all mind if I scream?”

Posted onMay 20, 2026

I wish I could lose weight as easily as I lose my keys, phone, temper, and my mind.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

I will be posting telepathically on all social media today. So if you think of something funny, that was me.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

The wind is about to blow me to Oz, so if you see me flying past your window, mind your business.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

My mind is like my web browser. 19 tabs are open, 3 are frozen and I have no idea where the music is coming from.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

Sometimes I’m grateful that thoughts don’t appear as bubbles over our heads.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

A haunted house, but it’s just you inside your own head.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

I have a mental illness that makes me think that people will change their minds if I present the correct arguments with the appropriate facts and data.

Posted onMay 20, 2026

That moment when you have to restart a song because the conversations in your head got too loud and you missed half the song.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

If you don’t like me, remember: it’s mind over matter. I don’t mind, and you don’t matter.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Great minds think alike. Unfortunately, so do stupid ones.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Have you ever been sitting around overthinking about overthinking, and then wonder why you’re even thinking that?

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Do you mind if I wear my black T-shirt covered in pet hair to your fine dining establishment?

Posted onMay 19, 2026

The most romantic minds of our time are being subjected to situationships.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

I speak my mind, cause it hurts when I bite my tongue.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

Friendly reminder to drink your water and mind your business this week.

Posted onMay 19, 2026

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