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When your phone doesn't understand the urgency of pizza and pajamas 🍕📱😅
281 Funny still quotes
It’s the weekend, so naturally, I’m going to spend 48 hours doing nothing, and still be exhausted.
Commentary:
Weekend warrior at doing absolutely nothing, and still earning a gold medal in napping! 🛌🤣💤
My favourite yoga pose is the one where you lay really still and do nothing.
Commentary:
The ultimate zen move: expert-level napping! 🧘♂️😴✨
I’m sorry I said “Awooga” when you took off your clothes. Do you still want to have sexy time?
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Awooga! Guess my inner cartoon character couldn't handle the wardrobe malfunction! 😂🚨
Ozzy Osbourne has mumbled through entire sentences, and I still understood him better than most of my exes.
Commentary:
Deciphering Ozzy is a skill I never knew I’d need for relationships 😂🤘🧩
Eating cold ravioli counts as breakfast if you’re still wearing yesterday’s clothes.
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Morning innovation: microwaving’s overrated when you’re dressed for a second day adventure! 🍝🤣👕
Sorry, I can’t go out this weekend. I went out last weekend, and I’m still recovering from that.
Commentary:
Looks like the socializing hangover is real! 😂🥴📅 I'll see you in 2024.
People who get 0-5 likes at max and still tweet all the time… What’s your secret?
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My secret? It's like shouting into the void, where the only echo is my unshakeable confidence 😂📣🕳️
Men, why do you still have the boxes your electronics came in?
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Holding onto boxes like we're preparing for the World's Slowest Moving Challenge 📦😂 #BoxCollectorsUnited
Nothing like a grandfather clock to remind you every hour that you’re still awake.
Commentary:
Tick-tock, I'm counting sheep in reverse! 🐑⏰😴