277 funny still quotes - Page 2 - Wordgag

Anyone still shut off lights when leaving a room because their parents used to say, “Don’t waste electricity!”

May 29, 2026

That moment when it’s January in a couple of weeks, and you realize you are still trying to lose weight from last January.

May 29, 2026

I could be staring at my hand locking my front door, and I still won’t feel 100% sure my front door was locked.

May 28, 2026

Do you ever think back about all the crazy stuff you did when you were younger, and wonder how you’re still alive?

May 28, 2026

If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

May 28, 2026

Am I the only person who hates spending the night at someone’s place? Like, we can hang out until 3 a.m., but I’m still going home.

May 28, 2026

Sorry, I said yippee when you took off your pants. Do you still think I’m hot?

May 28, 2026

When animals lead you to a place, it’s so cute… like, yes, I’m still following. Thank you for constantly turning around to make sure.

May 28, 2026

Shoutout to Netflix for being the only one that checks in on me every few hours. “Are you still watching?” Yeah, babe, thank you for asking.

May 28, 2026

Do people still actually eat 3 meals a day, or do we all just survive off of stress and iced coffee?

May 28, 2026

I have no idea how dishwasher tablets work. I’ve already taken five of them, and I still don’t feel like doing the dishes!

May 28, 2026

All this overthinking, and I still make the worst decisions.

May 28, 2026

How am I supposed to make life choices when I still use my fingers to count and sing the whole alphabet to see what letter comes next.

May 28, 2026

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

May 28, 2026

I could own a thousand summer dresses, and it still wouldn’t be enough.

May 28, 2026

If you put a pizza on top of a pizza, you have two pizzas. But if you stack two lasagnas, then you still have one lasagna.

May 28, 2026

Today I choose kindness, but we’ll see, it’s still early.

May 28, 2026

They say “Time heals.” No, it doesn’t. I’m still mad.

May 28, 2026

Make sure you bury me near a bathroom because death is long, and I’m sure I’ll still have to get up and pee.

May 28, 2026

Flying bugs can basically go anywhere they want, but still choose to fly right into your face.

May 28, 2026

Photogenic people are magical. You could snap a pic of them mid- explosive diarrhea, and they’d still look good.

May 28, 2026

I’m in my thirties, but I still feel like I am in my twenties; then I hang out with people in their twenties, and I’m like nope, definitely in my thirties.

May 28, 2026

Despite removing all the stains, I still lost my job as a church window cleaner.

May 28, 2026

Insurance is cool because even if you have it, it still kinda feels like you don’t.

May 28, 2026

You cannot go outside for a year or two. Come back, and the same people still be outside in the same places.

May 28, 2026

How does one stop eating ice cream when there’s still some in the container?

May 28, 2026

The other day, I got the crazy idea to see if I could still do a cartwheel. I can’t.

May 28, 2026

I can still drop it like it’s hot. It’s just a lot harder to pick it back up.

May 28, 2026

Thought you guys should know this was only Monday. It’s also still Monday.

May 28, 2026

I finally figured out my lifelong dream of becoming a human blanket, but my friends still call it napping on their couch.

May 28, 2026

Ever read a post multiple times, still tilt your head and whisper, “What?!”

May 27, 2026

I haven’t posted a selfie in a while, but I’m still very cute. Just to keep you updated.

May 27, 2026

Some of you are still single because, when someone sends you romantic words, you reply with “hahaha.”

May 27, 2026

Asked a German girl for her number, and I’m still waiting for the rest of the digits. So far, all I have is “nine.”

May 27, 2026

Nobody is more stressed than a person who has a lot of interests or passions and is still confused about their career.

May 27, 2026

Biting your tongue while eating is a perfect example of how you can still screw up, even with decades of experience.

May 27, 2026

I am MTV, still played music videos, years old.

May 27, 2026

Watched Titanic for the 14th time. Still sobbing. Still yelling, “SCOOT OVER, COW!” like it’ll change the ending.

May 27, 2026

Pinky promises are still a legit foundation of trust.

May 27, 2026

No matter how small you make that “unsubscribe” link, I’ll still find it.

May 27, 2026