Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

The folks who write fragrance commercials must be like “I had the weirdest dream, Imma put it on TV.”

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

My favorite 90s skill: Uninstalling my car stereo and hiding it in my glove box in under 15 seconds.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Turning in bad essays to professors you have a personal relationship with is the most humiliating thing ever.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Everyone has these three colleagues: The one who is always cold. The one who is always hungry. The one who is always tired. I am everything in one.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

Oh really? We’ll see what the same six people who always agree with me think about that.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

Summer: 10 minutes outside, 10 hours in front of the AC.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

You should always wear a helmet when doing dangerous things or talking about politics.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

Instagram should let you extend the run of one story for another 24 hours if the intended target didn’t see it.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Hey, people, my age. Remember going into the computer lab at school?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

I either text back right away or never, because I saw your text, replied in my head but forgot to actually type it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,479

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Messenger:

I will not hesitate to use dark magic on you.

Making waves on Twitch:

Was that meant to be a joke or did you just accidentally spill a bunch of words you were carrying around?

Spotted on X:

I no longer need an alarm clock because I’m over 40 and have a bladder.

Trending via Pinterest:

I’ve convinced myself bumblebees don’t sting because they’re too fluffy and cute.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

The gaps in my resume are from the space bar.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Your skull is the only thing preventing your brain from floating away, unburdened as it is by any meaningful thought to anchor it.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

Spotted on Instagram:

Nobody in the entire world has ever known what to do with me.

Trending via Messenger:

I’m at that point in my life where if a car hit me, I’d probably say thank you to the kind stranger.

Going viral on YouTube:

I’m a big believer in not going to work on your birthday!

I have one of those metal briefcases handcuffed to my wrist, and inside… my grandmother’s meatloaf recipe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Finally, a family secret worth guarding like Fort Knox! 🥩🗝️☢️

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

46 shares on Snapchat this month:

A sperm bank implies the existence of sperm markets, which further implies the existence of high-frequency sperm trading.

62 shares on TikTok this month:

It’s so cold outside I saw a gangster pull his pants up and walk stiffly.

77 shares on Discord this month:

If you don’t have at least one white friend named “Matt”, then you are Matt.

71 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My CV is so good, companies are still reading it for 9 months.

53 shares on Telegram this month:

You can reach me by butterfly.

70 shares on Snapchat this month:

If he has other girls who make him smile, be different and make him cry.

88 shares on Messenger this month:

Please no more relationships that are supposed to be a lesson. I’m already quite the scholar.

39 shares on Messenger this month:

Me summer vacation planning: I’m going to Europe. Bank account: You’re going camping.

48 shares on Pinterest this month:

Being late to work should never be that serious. At least I came?

27 shares on Telegram this month:

You know those couples who share their food? I mean, what kind of people are they? Aren’t they hungry?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

One of the most embarrassing things in the world: walking downhill.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

“I have an AI boyfriend.” No, you don’t. It’s Adam and Eve or Adam and Steve, not Adam and USB.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

No one has ever believed in me more than this waitress, who brought me buffalo wings and a single wet nap.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

What I’ve learned in all these years of marriage is how to open a bottle of beer silently.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I didn’t respond to your message, I got stuck in a cloud while skydiving and lived for 72 days by drinking rain and eating birds that flew too close.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Work can be tiring at times, and you might feel like quitting. But remember those plane tickets.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I learn from the mistakes of people who took my advice.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

All quiet on the frontal lobe.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent a day where I don’t think.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Feeling melancholy. Think I’ll have a drink and make things much worse.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,537

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

Nothing prepared me for how much of my adult life would be spent hiding from people I know at the grocery store.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

What’s the opposite of FOMO? The feeling of knowing you made the right decision not going somewhere once you see or hear dispatches from it.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Forget all this adulting stuff, let’s bring back Saturday morning cartoons.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Congratulations on getting to the red light first. You’re special.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

Blocking me is like blocking the sun, the moon and the stars.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

One of the most embarrassing things in the world: walking downhill.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Therapy isn’t enough. I need to run my brain through the dishwasher.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

My doctor told me I should try anger management classes, and I’m still really pissed at him about it.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

The most productive species of beaver is the Eager.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

Male barista called me “my love” yesterday and didn’t say it today… getting mixed signals and feeling really upset.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Sat at a stop sign waiting for it to turn green, if you’re wondering how I’m doing today.

Just landed via TikTok:

Hey, people, my age. Remember going into the computer lab at school?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I remember when Britain used to be so rich, you’d be embarrassed to go into a Lidl or Aldi.

Just shared via Messenger:

I tried being the bigger person but all it got me was type 2 diabetes.

Freshly posted on Slack:

If a dog growled at me, I would try to understand where they’re coming from.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Sometimes after sex, I wonder what it would be like to have sex as a couple.

Going viral on Facebook:

Your email finds me deeply unwell. Teetering on the edge really.

Spotted on Discord:

Call me Frankenstein the way I’m piecing it together.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Taking screenshots of the screenshots buried in my photo library to ‘bring them to the front.’ It’s not a great system, I admit.

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