I like my women like I like my glasses: thick, transparent, and uneven.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

I love when women move on. It’s my favourite genre.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

I don’t like the person I become when my boss tells me I should be working while at work.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

Blocking people isn’t enough. I need their favorite TV show to get cancelled.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

If you ever go backpacking in the wilderness, be sure to wear corduroy pants, so you can start a fire if needed.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

I bet aliens lock their door when they go past earth.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Of course babies cry when flying, their entire understanding of planes centers around them being eaten.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

“Your password is too weak!” Just wait until you see my impulse control.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Day number 3 without coffee: Lost hearing in my left eye.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Spotify should have helpful mental health suggestions like “your top listens are Taylor Swift and true crime, go to therapy.”