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Commentary:
Ah, the mental gymnastics of self-awareness – a never-ending loop of "I am" and "I think"! 🤔💭 It's like a philosophical merry-go-round that never stops spinning! 🔄 Just remember, Descartes' brain never rests – it's a real workout up there! 💪🧠

am, existence, humor, i, philosophy, self-reflection, think

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Welcome to your 40s: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

2 months ago

40s, aging, another, appearance, chin, humor, joke, loneliness, lonely, looks, self-deprecation, welcome
I still can’t believe Aldi sells shopping carts for 25 cents. I’ve got 8 of them now and don’t really even have a use for them, it was just too good of a deal to pass up.

1 month ago

25, Aldi, bargain, behavior, believe, buy, cart, consumer, consumer behavior, deal, even, good, humor, i, impulse, impulse buy, just, pass, shopping, shopping cart, still, too, unexpected, unexpected use
First caveman to see fire: Well, this is a buncha bullshit that no one needs (stomps it out) and I predict that’s the last I’ll ever see of that.

2 months ago

ancient, bullshit, caveman, ever, evolution, fire, humor, i, last, misunderstanding, needs, prediction, reaction, skepticism, well
Telling my parents they’re like family to me.

4 months ago

family, humor, me, parent, parents, relationship, sarcasm, telling
I want to be a house cat and simply slap the shit out of anything in front of me that I do not understand.

1 month ago

animal, animal behavior, anything, behavior, carefree, cat, confusion, front, frustration, house, house cat, humor, i, me, shit, simplicity, slap, understand, want
Lately I have the attention span of wait what?

1 month ago

attention, attention span, comedy, confusion, distraction, forgetfulness, humor, i, span, wait, wit

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.

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They should invent a situationship that turns into something beautiful.

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I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

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“Some men go months without being hugged.” Okay, then they should just hug each other.

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FOMO? No, I’ve got FOBI. Fear of being invited.

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It’s a shame that you can’t hold people up to the light like banknotes to see whether they are fake or real.

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I am convinced that some of you are failed experiments that gained sentience and escaped from a lab.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

Late replies don’t bother me. As long as we’re not in love, or you don’t owe me money, take your time.

Just shared via Instagram:

If pigeons could talk, they would bum a cigarette.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Did you know 17 muscles are activated when you’re crying? Fitness is my passion.

Just landed via Instagram:

“You’re a cardiologist? Is that like a fancy name for an auto mechanic?”

Freshly posted on Threads:

Not sure what’s longer: a microwave minute or watching a video while someone else is holding the phone, insisting it’s hilarious.

Breaking via Reddit:

Breakfast is the most important beer of the day.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

If I were karma, I’d watch my back.

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I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Welcome to your 40s: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

I still can’t believe Aldi sells shopping carts for 25 cents. I’ve got 8 of them now and don’t really even have a use for them, it was just too good of a deal to pass up.

First caveman to see fire: Well, this is a buncha bullshit that no one needs (stomps it out) and I predict that’s the last I’ll ever see of that.

Telling my parents they’re like family to me.

I want to be a house cat and simply slap the shit out of anything in front of me that I do not understand.

Lately I have the attention span of wait what?

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

Processed food was literally designed for you to eat. Organic is just some crap they found on the ground somewhere.

Me, watching porn: they’re just going to let that pizza get cold?

Scientists just confirmed that our dreams were real in another reality.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Nobody is more cold-blooded than a toddler, just saying what they see and feel.

Imagine thinking you have all the answers.

A female will ghost you, and the whole time she is waiting for you to text back again.

Please be nice to me. I’m in my twenties. Do you know what that does to a person?

Guilty pleasure? Why would I ever feel guilty about pleasure.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Should we all just give up and get really into drugs? Wait, this is literally what happened in the 60s. That just clicked for me.

Someone taking your parking space at your own home is a different type of anger.

Please don’t ask me what my hobbies are, I lost interest in life back in 6th grade.

Kinda messed up that the government knows my birthday but never sends me a gift or anything.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

If my dog knew how many photos I have of him sleeping, he’d file a restraining order against me.

Nothing more rude than taking a photo of yourself and it looking like how you actually look, and not how you look inside your head.

I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me.

When I try to figure out rows vs. columns, I just row away in my boat of confusion!

“You handled that with such grace” are words that have never been spoken to me.

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I think, therefore I am. I am, therefore I think. Therefore I am. I think.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Welcome to your 40s: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

I still can’t believe Aldi sells shopping carts for 25 cents. I’ve got 8 of them now and don’t really even have a use for them, it was just too good of a deal to pass up.

First caveman to see fire: Well, this is a buncha bullshit that no one needs (stomps it out) and I predict that’s the last I’ll ever see of that.

Telling my parents they’re like family to me.

I want to be a house cat and simply slap the shit out of anything in front of me that I do not understand.

Lately I have the attention span of wait what?

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