Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

My phone went from fully charged to 10% while I was sleeping, so I guess it leads a more exciting nightlife than I do.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

Human hibernation should be a thing.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Men tell you “I know a place” and bring you to the brink of madness.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

I try to shoot all of my garbage into outer space, but usually it just lands in my neighbor’s backyard.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

Watching Jaws with my kid because I’m sick of going to the beach.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

Imagine how scary sharks would be if they wore necklaces made out of our teeth.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

If the zombie apocalypse happens we’re double screwed because there are millions on record as having no brain.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

I accidentally take a screenshot of my phone background at least once a week.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

Wearing shorts and my pale legs screamed at the sensation of sunlight like vampires.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

I love saying “why would I lie” when I’m lying.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

778 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,940

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,940

27 minutes ago

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on LinkedIn:

What makes us human is selecting all images with traffic lights.

Breaking via Pinterest:

People who work in customer service should be allowed to fight one customer a day. Two on Fridays.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I could be a masseuse, or I could just be pulling your leg.

Seen just now on X:

Failed relationships can be described as so much wasted make-up.

Trending via Reddit:

I wonder if Mary and Joseph hated putting away the Christmas stuff as much as I do.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Once when I was exercising, I realized that I was allergic to it. I was out of breath, sweating and my heart was racing.

Just shared via WeChat:

Non-parents be like: I would simply instruct the toddler to do something he doesn’t want to do, and he would obey.

Making waves on Discord:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

Just shared via Discord:

I wonder what other animals we tried to ride before discovering that horses were cool with it.

Trending via WeChat:

I’m a simple person. All I need in life to be happy is to have everything go my way and work out how I want it to.

I’m exactly where I want to be. At home, avoiding people.

2 months ago

I’m exactly where I want to be. At home, avoiding people.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the classic perfect spot—home sweet fortress of solitude! 🏡🙅‍♀️ Nothing beats the joy of dodging social interactions like a ninja of alone-time. Stay cozy, my friend—your personal bubble is the best vacation! 😄🎈

avoiding, avoiding people, comfort, comfort zone, exactly, home, humor, i, introvert, people, solitude, want, where, zone

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

778 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,940

Funny Quotes Topics

13,912

Funny Quotes Images

10,940

27 minutes ago

3,431

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Actually, men should take the pill. It makes more sense to unload the gun than to shoot at a bulletproof vest.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

No, I won’t be attending your seance, I barely want to talk to the living.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

When you look this sexy, they should let you leave work early.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

I dropped and broke my phone today. Hurt more than childbirth!

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

I don’t jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Peer pressure has nothing on me; all my bad decisions are made single-handedly.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

Another day without sex, but a mosquito just sucked on my neck and I moaned a little bit.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

I failed as a person; I’m a dinosaur now.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

My boss just left which means I have finished all of my work for the day.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

Starting my period on election day because I’m a true patriot who bleeds for this country.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

Here’s to another day of outward smiles and inward screams.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Christmas is the season of giving, and I’m giving up for good.

Just shared via Instagram:

Unlike the stomach, the brain doesn’t alert you when it’s empty.

Shared recently on Twitch:

First they give you butterflies, then mental health problems.

Just landed via WeChat:

If hot showers aren’t good for you then why do I emerge from them bright red like a beautiful ruby?

Spotted on LinkedIn:

If you’re ever intimidated by someone just imagine them opening a Capri Sun.

Spotted on Messenger:

That incredible ability of cats to only throw up on carpeted floors.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I had zero respect for my boss until he started appearing exclusively by hologram.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

A Tinder type app, but it matches you with sandwiches.

Making waves on Threads:

Dear recipe websites. I don’t need your life story. Just give me the recipe.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴