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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

Women are like apples; I like biting them.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Saw a guy reading a book and writing notes in it. Not enough words in there for ya, bud?

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

I’m literally overstimulated with life. I need to scream on top of a mountain.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

My brain has too many tabs open.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

That pile of clothes on my bed, seems to have strange powers and gets higher on its own.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

Just had a salad but it didn’t make me laugh like women in stock photos.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Tourists love to think that they are not like other tourists.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

After cooking show a dishwashing show with same host but kind of drunk.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Summer Olympics is just me swimming in sweat and wrestling with my sports bra.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,358

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on YouTube:

That moment when a zombie out for brains walks past you.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

The lion does not concern himself with social proof.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

It’s actually crazy we figured out how to grow real diamonds that are cheaper and better quality than the real thing, and so many people are still like, no thanks, the suffering is what makes it special.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Better to be a wolf that everyone hates, than a donkey that everyone rides.

Making waves on Instagram:

I have had songs stuck in my head and I have had people stuck in my head, I highly recommend songs.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Whoever first said, “I’m in a pickle,” must have had the weirdest day.

Just landed via WeChat:

The collective noun for a group of narcissists should be an ‘egosystem’.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Weirdos gonna weird.

Just landed via X:

Some days you’re the shit and some days you’re the fan.

Going viral on Messenger:

Foo fighters still fighting foo.

I’m so loyal to my music, I’ll hunt down a song I used to love five years back.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Channeling my inner musical archaeologist to dig up that ancient bop 😂🎶🕵️‍♂️

back, five, humor, hunt, i, love, loyal, loyalty, music, nostalgia, obsession, song, used

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Remember, if you start with, “It’s crazy to think…” you can say whatever you want.

0

2 months ago

crazy, expression, freedom, humor, remember, say, start, think, want, whatever
Never get in between a girl and her fries. It’s just common sense really.

0

2 months ago

common, common sense, food, fry, girl, humor, just, never, relationship, sense, snack
Some people’s high horses are actually donkeys.

0

2 months ago

actually, arrogance, donkey, high, high horse, horse, horses, humility, humor, humor quote, sarcasm, satire
Lasagna has never broken my heart. Just saying.

0

2 months ago

broken, food, heart, humor, just, lasagna, love, never, relationship, saying
Have you ever been so hungry but had no food in the house, so you took a nap instead?

0

2 months ago

ever, food, funny situation, house, humor, hunger, hungry, nap, procrastination, relatable, situation, tiredness
Light is faster than sound. That’s why people seem so bright until you hear them talk.

0

2 months ago

bright, communication, faster, hear, humor, intelligence, irony, light, people, perception, sound, talk, wit

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

33 shares on Pinterest this month:

Lately I have the attention span of wait what?

75 shares on TikTok this month:

Things went well until the evil supermarket people hid my favorite products in new places.

11 shares on Facebook this month:

At no single point in the Bible does it tell you not to sell drugs.

59 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The whole “read before you go to bed to get sleepy” thing does not apply to me because I will be up till 5 a.m. if the book is worth it.

10 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My tween would like you to know I ruined his life when I told him to stop being super sus and cringe and be more lit yo.

62 shares on Reddit this month:

Sorry, I’m late. I found my old CD collection.

48 shares on Discord this month:

Instead of hairstyles and make-up, there should be YouTube tutorials on polite behavior.

60 shares on Slack this month:

Not to brag, but I skipped my mid-life crisis and went straight to cranky old man.

47 shares on Reddit this month:

Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

68 shares on Threads this month:

Pretty messed up that my body, a chemistry lab made of meat, simply chooses to make me feel a little bit nervous for no reason.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

At the age where a big break could mean either my career or a hip.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

No wine. No peace. Know wine. Know peace.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

I’m already excited about who I’m going to think sucks first today.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

One day you said w00t for the last time, and didn’t even realize.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

Men used to send love letters in the middle of wars, and now they think reassurance is too much effort.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Dear liars, I hope every pair of pants you own are on fire.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

My Christmas letter this year includes a bonus DVD of my colonoscopy.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

Doing nothing is hard. You never know when you are done.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

The incontinent optimist sees the bladder as half empty.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

What was the main bloke called in Harry Potter?

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via X:

I’m so lucky people can’t hear what I’m thinking.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Everyone should be more grateful for what I don’t say.

Spotted on Threads:

I always ask for a receipt so I can keep them in my purse for 86 years.

Going viral on Messenger:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely fulfilled the prophecy.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I’m at that age where someone can call me the wrong name and I’m just like “whatever, I’ll be Dan for a minute”.

Just landed via Reddit:

Not texting back is only ok when I do it.

Just landed via Reddit:

Next time I die, I’m going to make sure I’m reincarnated someplace other than Earth.

Going viral on Twitch:

By accepting their pardons, the turkeys are admitting guilt.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

When I die, I hope it’s early in the morning, so I don’t have to go to work that day for no reason.

Seen just now on Slack:

Some days you are the table and some days you are the toe.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m so loyal to my music, I’ll hunt down a song I used to love five years back.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Remember, if you start with, “It’s crazy to think…” you can say whatever you want.

Never get in between a girl and her fries. It’s just common sense really.

Some people’s high horses are actually donkeys.

Lasagna has never broken my heart. Just saying.

Have you ever been so hungry but had no food in the house, so you took a nap instead?

Light is faster than sound. That’s why people seem so bright until you hear them talk.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨