Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Yeah, bro, she’s probably just not using her phone right now, for the first time ever in her whole life.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

What an awful time to be even remotely aware of what is going on in the world.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Dude, we’re biting off more than we can chew tonight if you want to pull up.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

I like my mornings to be slow and quiet. I want the day to romance me a bit before it tries to mess me up.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

The worst part about borrowing money is having to pay it back or move to a new city.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Everyone’s worried about a recession, but babes, we’re heading for a dark age.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I made the mistake of clicking on an Instagram ad for a flannel shirt, and now the algorithm thinks I’m a lumberjack.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

I never give second chances, just 10 and then goodbye.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Oh, you’re in a situationship? Are you the one with commitment issues or the one with low self-worth?

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

They all cheat, lie and manipulate. Just pick the pretty one.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,425

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I just agree with people so that they stop talking.

Trending via WhatsApp:

“I don’t do politics.” Politics will do you, my brother and sister. Politics will do you like mad.

Just landed via Telegram:

Middle children as adults still trying to get attention because the oldest is being dramatic and the younger child is getting away with everything.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Celery is depressing green water wafers.

Making waves on YouTube:

If you can’t tell which family member is coming up the stairs by the speed and weight of their footsteps, are you even family?

Just shared via Instagram:

Whenever you feel like the world is falling apart, take a deep breath and remember you’re right.

Seen just now on Twitch:

You can tell it’s laundry day because I’m wearing flippers and a Viking helmet.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Later is the best time to do anything.

Going viral on Discord:

I don’t need to grow a thick skin. The world needs to grow fewer thorns.

Making waves on WeChat:

I try not to post too much, to give everyone else a better chance at being seen.

Nobody can ragebait as successfully as your own mother can.

2 hours ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Moms have a PhD in pushing buttons 😂👩‍🎓💥

family, frustration, humor, mother, nobody, own, parent, ragebait, relationship, sarcasm

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My favorite delusion is that I just need to get through this week.

0

5 months ago

delusion, favorite, humor, i, just, motivation, need, optimism, procrastination, stress, through, week
Turns out, sitting on the porch, feeding birds and squirrels, is a pretty good treatment for depression.

0

6 months ago

activity, bird, birds, depression, feeding, good, health, hobby, mental, mental health, nature, outdoor, outdoor activity, porch, pretty, relaxation, sitting, squirrel, squirrels, treatment
Sex makes you happy. So I understand your dissatisfaction.

0

2 months ago

dissatisfaction, fun, happy, humor, i, intimacy, relationship, sex, understand
My wife asked me why the bottle of wine we bought yesterday was half empty. I said because she is a pessimist.

0

2 months ago

asked, bottle, conversation, drinking, empty, half, humor, i, joke, me, pessimist, relationship, said, why, wife, wine, yesterday
People ask you, “are you crazy”, and then get scared when you answer, “yes”.

0

2 months ago

answer, ask, crazy, honesty, humor, people, question, scared, yes
“Damn, you’re tight!” I whisper as I look at my monthly budget.

0

4 weeks ago

budget, finance, humor, i, money, monthly, monthly budget, personal, personal finance, sarcasm, tight, tight budget, whisper

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

89 shares on Slack this month:

The October urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a horrifying backstory.

100 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Problematic bed time gap relationship.

27 shares on Discord this month:

Thanks to social media, you can now meet weirdos from the comfort of your own home.

72 shares on Reddit this month:

A haunted house, but every room is just learning more about Will & Jada.

82 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I just sneezed into my elbow and now I’m waiting for a preschool teacher to praise me.

20 shares on YouTube this month:

There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.

24 shares on Discord this month:

The moon is literally dragging the oceans around, and you think your body shouldn’t feel it?

97 shares on Telegram this month:

August is technically summer, but spiritually fall.

81 shares on Discord this month:

Instead of writing LOL, I’m going to start writing SALTS (smiled a little, then stopped). It’s more accurate.

10 shares on TikTok this month:

It’s our first time on Earth, so why are you a life coach?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

If you are influenced by influencers, you’re beyond retarded.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

What age will I grow out of not answering the door when I’m home and sneaking around the house to find out who’s knocking?

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

Good morning everyone, who feels like working today? I promise I’ll let you do my job.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

I used to think adulthood was one crisis after another. I was wrong. Multiple crises. Concurrently. All at once. All the time. Forever.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

Look at you with tape over your camera, while Amazon, Facebook, and Google have your whole life on file.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Fun fact: The confetti you’ll see in Times Square tonight was made from one CVS receipt.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

WhatsApp calls should indicate whose internet is poor to avoid unnecessary arguments.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

Nobody lures you into a gingerbread house in the forest anymore.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Yeah, sex is cool, but have you ever taken an afternoon nap on the couch?

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

If at first you don’t succeed, the internet will let you know immediately.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I hate starting new relationships. I gotta act like I ain’t crazy for two months.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

My idea of fun is watching something on the TV while I look at relevant Wikipedia articles on my phone.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Do men know they don’t have to keep their clothing until it disintegrates?

Just shared via Threads:

Ignored the small door that appeared in my apartment three days ago, and now it’s gone. That’s how it’s done.

Live now on Snapchat:

You’re 25, stressing like you’re 40, because you want to be rich before 30, am I right?

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Everyone thinks they will be the first person in history to maintain their dignity while posting online.

Just landed via Instagram:

I remixed a remix, it was back to normal.

Just shared via X:

Nobody gives me butterflies anymore. Y’all just give me brain damage.

Spotted on Slack:

Liking someone who likes you back is probably really good for your mental health.

Just landed via X:

I now have Taylor Swift as my alarm. Now I always wake up five minutes earlier so I don’t have to listen to it.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Nobody can ragebait as successfully as your own mother can.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

My favorite delusion is that I just need to get through this week.

Turns out, sitting on the porch, feeding birds and squirrels, is a pretty good treatment for depression.

Sex makes you happy. So I understand your dissatisfaction.

My wife asked me why the bottle of wine we bought yesterday was half empty. I said because she is a pessimist.

People ask you, “are you crazy”, and then get scared when you answer, “yes”.

“Damn, you’re tight!” I whisper as I look at my monthly budget.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨