Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Well, someone's pants are definitely on fire! 🔥 Looks like the complaint department is open for business after all! 😄#CaughtInTheAct 🤥

complain, honesty, humor, i, lie, self-deprecation, sorry

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Standing on a scale and thinking: so much wisdom and inner beauty can’t be light.

2 months ago

beauty, body, body image, humor, image, inner, inner beauty, light, much, scale, self-reflection, standing, thinking, weight, wisdom
Every time I see a dog with its head out a window, I know it’s having a better day than I am.

2 months ago

am, animal, better, comparison, daily, daily life, day, dog, every, happiness, having, head, humor, i, joy, know, life, pet, time, window
Guys, stop showering. I need the water for ChatGPT.

1 month ago

ChatGPT, conservation, guys, humor, i, joke, need, shower, stop, technology, water, water conservation
Taking a sip of beer and letting out a big “ahhhh” so the pregnant lady at the pool next to me knows what she’s missing.

2 months ago

beer, beverage, big, humor, joke, knows, lady, letting, me, missing, next, pool, pregnancy, pregnant, relaxation, social, summer, taking
Dear diary, sorry for only ever talking about myself. How are you? Do you have any hobbies?

2 months ago

conversation, diary, ever, hobby, humor, introspection, monologue, myself, self-centered, sorry, talking
I’ve been so stressed about getting my shit together that I haven’t gotten any of my shit together.

2 months ago

getting, humor, i, life, motivation, procrastination, self-improvement, shit, stress, together

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

30 shares on Instagram this month:

I did not “try to rob a bank,” I just “aspired” to obtain more money.

33 shares on WeChat this month:

As a pigeon mother, I would never let my pigeon daughter hang around the station. That’s really no place for a young pigeon lady.

63 shares on Reddit this month:

An orgy where everyone looks identical is called a doppelgängerbänger.

17 shares on WhatsApp this month:

It goes like this: You are born and then you basically do almost everything wrong. Then you die.

48 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s okay to feed your car a curb, as a little treat sometimes.

81 shares on WeChat this month:

My problem areas are my upper arms and earth.

54 shares on Slack this month:

I bet the kids in Mrs. Doubtfire were surprised when found out their nanny was famous actor Robin Williams the whole time.

16 shares on Threads this month:

Meetings are great because who doesn’t like being held hostage?

76 shares on Threads this month:

If you’re having trouble finding the match to one of your socks, throw it away and the missing one will immediately show up. Follow me for more life hacks.

46 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m sick of the Microsoft Authenticator. Like, who would be logging in to do my work?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping they’re braver than me.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

When your parents are on a call and they ask for a pen, man, that pressure is real.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Some people pack their lives so full of activities, appointments and people that I get exhausted just reading about it.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

The pigeons are plotting to overthrow the government. It will start with a coo.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

Everyone is posting their vacation pictures and I’m like… I went shopping.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

There aren’t enough hours in the day for me to do absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

Every ‘c’ in ‘Pacific Ocean’ is pronounced differently.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

We need a Disney princess who’s a greedy profiteer, so we can cheer for the poison apple.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

The delivery guy absolutely hates it when I call him my pizza mule.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

I can’t keep up anymore. Happy birthday to everyone for the rest of your life.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

My cat just knocked over my coffee mug and looked at me like it was my fault. How dare I put it on the edge of the table?

Live now on Twitch:

They should invent something in between coffee and narcotics.

Trending via Messenger:

The lion is actually pretty concerned right now.

Just landed via Instagram:

Nothing prepared me for how much of my adult life would be spent hiding from people I know at the grocery store.

Just landed via Telegram:

Growing up, there was a Cody in every elementary school class, but as an adult, I haven’t met a Cody in years. Where did they go?

Just landed via Discord:

Me, first week as a volunteer firefighter thinking we only rescue cats: We’re going where?

Seen just now on Telegram:

Pepsi & Coca-Cola can’t even be in the same restaurant… and we want world peace.

Spotted on TikTok:

Don’t forget to tell yourself more lies today.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Why would I date a nonchalant man? I like my men how I like my thong.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I just need to lie down for a couple of years.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Sorry I lied when I said “I can’t complain.”

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Standing on a scale and thinking: so much wisdom and inner beauty can’t be light.

Every time I see a dog with its head out a window, I know it’s having a better day than I am.

Guys, stop showering. I need the water for ChatGPT.

Taking a sip of beer and letting out a big “ahhhh” so the pregnant lady at the pool next to me knows what she’s missing.

Dear diary, sorry for only ever talking about myself. How are you? Do you have any hobbies?

I’ve been so stressed about getting my shit together that I haven’t gotten any of my shit together.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨