Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Animals are so crazy because, why is your mom only one year older than you?

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

King-sized beds: Because you both want to sleep on the same mattress, but not in the same zip code.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

If the man is silent, he is a thinker. If the woman is silent, the thinker is in big trouble.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

I used to be sad about the climate apocalypse, but I went on a few dates and, honestly, I’m ready now.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Is ‘ugh’ an emotion? Because I fell it all the time.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

If you’re doing Dry January, please, please, keep it to yourself. Nobody cares, and you’re probably even more boring without alcohol.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

Polar lights: when the sky forgets it’s supposed to be boring.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Some of these fake tans look like an old Tupperware container that’s had marinara sauce in it.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

My problem with Christmas shopping is that I keep seeing things that I like… for me.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

You can’t get a good night’s sleep anymore because of woke.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,436

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

I eat cake because it’s somebody’s birthday somewhere.

Spotted on Threads:

I just read a thing that said I should compliment myself on my decisions, regardless of the outcome. No thanks, I’m not the government.

Making waves on Discord:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

Trending via TikTok:

Just found out it don’t matter how early I go to bed, I just don’t wanna go to work.

Going viral on WeChat:

It is very hard to set aside the time to do your taxes when you are really busy doing other things like eating a snack or looking around the room.

Seen just now on Slack:

“Devil’s advocate” implies the existence of heaven’s prosecutor.

Trending via TikTok:

I’ve been on Facebook for so long, I remember when it all used to be farmland.

Trending via Threads:

When I die, I hope it’s early in the morning, so I don’t have to go to work that day for no reason.

Seen just now on X:

Changing my relationship status from “Single” to “I give up.”

Just landed via X:

Sending messages is easy. Living with them forever is the hard part.

When I’m feeling old, I like to visit my parents so they can push all my buttons until I lose my shit and just like that, I’m 16 again.

4 weeks ago

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Commentary:
Isn't it amazing how parents have that superpower to teleport us back to our teenage angst years on demand? 🕰️🤣🍼

16, again, button, buttons, emotional, emotional trigger, family, feeling, feeling old, humor, i, just, lose, nostalgia, old, parent, parents, push, shit, teenager, trigger, visit

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

0

2 months ago

comparison, cooking, essential, essential oil, food, humor, me, oil, sarcasm, taco
Arkansas is just Kansas for pirates.

0

2 months ago

Arkansas, comparison, funny comparison, geography, humor, just, Kansas, pirates, wordplay
My favorite conspiracy theory is that everything is going to be OK.

0

2 months ago

conspiracy, conspiracy theory, everything, favorite, going, hope, humor, ok, optimism, reassurance, theory
I used to have this mental illness, where I thought putting your heart and soul into a relationship would make it work.

0

1 month ago

effort, heart, humor, i, illness, love, mental, mental illness, putting, relationship, sarcasm, soul, thought, used, where, work
If I turned into a “teen wolf”, my first order of business would definitely be helping my basketball team get to the local championships.

0

2 months ago

basketball, business, championships, helping, humor, i, local, order, spirit, sports, team, team spirit, teen, teen wolf, transformation, wolf
The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

0

2 months ago

advice, clue, humor, say, should, uncertainty, urge

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

29 shares on Twitch this month:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just sitting on the couch googling if penguins have knees.

38 shares on TikTok this month:

Sleeping is nice, because you’re not actually dead and you’re not awake, so its a win-win situation.

66 shares on WeChat this month:

I bring a very “are you going to eat your pickle” vibe to lunch meetings.

62 shares on Threads this month:

Adulting looked way more affordable in the 90’s. I feel scammed.

41 shares on Messenger this month:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

60 shares on TikTok this month:

I finally became a butterfly, and everyone’s already asking what’s next.

65 shares on LinkedIn this month:

No matter how busy I am, I still find time to waste on Twitter.

22 shares on YouTube this month:

A lot of childhood characters weren’t so much beloved as there wasn’t anything else on the TV.

66 shares on Instagram this month:

Grocery shopping before Christmas is a nightmare. My milk expired while I was waiting in line.

67 shares on Facebook this month:

No, I won’t be attending your seance, I barely want to talk to the living.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

I bet doom scroll meant something way cooler in the middle ages.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

If you lift the cat off the couch and it sounds like Velcro, then it didn’t want to leave.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Hello bedtime my old friend, my brain is laughing once again.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

The date abruptly ended over a disagreement on how to pronounce Gnocchi.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Imagine the carnage at an IKEA team building event.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

I need one of those jobs they have in sitcoms, where it pays my rent but interferes with exactly zero of my social plans or situations.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Hello 911? Yes, my wife is forcing me to walk over to meet the neighbors.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

I’m like if a birthday card with no money inside was a person.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Netflix needs to stop asking if I’m still watching and start asking if I moved the laundry to the dryer yet.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Took a break from social media because my cat was asleep on my phone.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

People my age are on baby #2, and I’m on drink #5.

Making waves on Messenger:

Kiss me like you’re trying to damn my soul and save it in the same breath.

Live now on Telegram:

“I’ll see” = not coming, never was coming, never even considered it.

Going viral on Instagram:

Sometimes, before bedtime, I fall asleep on the couch. It’s my little sleep appetizer… my nappetizer.

Making waves on TikTok:

Please respond to my telepathic messages.

Spotted on TikTok:

Violence is not the answer, unless you’re a gaggle of children instructed to break into a piñata.

Breaking via Facebook:

Took a break from social media because my cat was asleep on my phone.

Just landed via Facebook:

A perfect metaphor for my life would be “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock.”

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Sex is cool, but have you ever had a can opener that actually works?

Making waves on Messenger:

Why did they call it an Amazon wishlist and not an ‘Oughttobuyography’.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

When I’m feeling old, I like to visit my parents so they can push all my buttons until I lose my shit and just like that, I’m 16 again.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

Arkansas is just Kansas for pirates.

My favorite conspiracy theory is that everything is going to be OK.

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought putting your heart and soul into a relationship would make it work.

If I turned into a “teen wolf”, my first order of business would definitely be helping my basketball team get to the local championships.

The urge to say “yeah, you should do that”, especially when you have no clue.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨