Commentary:
Now I spend half my day trying to figure out if my dog is secretly plotting to take over the living room throne 🐶🛋️🤔
Author Archives: slickboy
Adulting is getting excited to go home and get into bed.
Commentary:
"Ah, the thrill of pyjama parties with my pillow! 🎉😴"
Is stir-fry the only dish where the instructions are in the name?
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Sure, just throw the ingredients in a pan, and give them a stir—voilà, you're a master chef! 🥢🥦🔥
A thing I never realized about being an adult is that you will always be cleaning your kitchen. No matter if you get takeout, no matter if you’re gone all day, you will be cleaning the kitchen.
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Never knew adulthood meant earning a PhD in kitchenology! 🧼🍽️🔄
What age do you learn to cook pasta for one and not for a whole village? Asking for a friend.
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When you find the answer, direct me to the secret pasta society meeting. 🍝🙈
I do not like how Netflix threatens to start the movie while I’m just tryna read the description. Like, please, you’re making me anxious.
Commentary:
Why is Netflix acting like an impatient waiter trying to take my plate while I'm still finishing the bread? 🍿😅📚
Can’t believe I spent so many years of my life asking teachers if I was allowed to use the bathroom, and sometimes be told no. What the hell?
Commentary:
Remembering those days when teachers doubled as restroom gatekeepers 🤔🚪 Who knew bladder control was part of the curriculum? 😂🚽📚
When someone loses something, I like to ask helpful questions like ‘Where did you last see it?’ and ‘Where did you put it?’ and ‘Where is it?’
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Asking the deep questions! Next on my list: "Have you tried asking the universe?" 🤔🔍✨
If you can’t tell which family member is coming up the stairs by the speed and weight of their footsteps, are you even family?
Commentary:
Sounds like a family game of "Guess Who?" but with footsteps instead of faces! 👣😂
“NOT dishwasher safe!” You’ll be okay, buddy, just do your best in there.
Commentary:
Ah, the dishwasher initiation rite! May you emerge stronger and only slightly more water-resistant! 🚿😂🔄