Being quiet in a room full of loud people is my favorite sport.

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Me, when someone’s obsessed with me: Yikes! Me, when someone’s not obsessed with me: WTF?

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My morning yoga routine has really helped shift my lower back pain into my upper back.

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Cigarettes are a better networking tool than LinkedIn could ever dream of being.

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Limbo is the only sport where being really bad at it means you’re raising the bar.

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I forgot to turn my clocks back and, oh my God, you guys are not going to believe the stuff that happens in the next hour.

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Your child learning to say mommy is when your life begins and ends.

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I’ll call it a smartphone when I yell “Where’s my phone?” and it yells back “Down here in the couch cushions!”

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In case anyone hasn’t told you today, I’m beautiful.

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Middle children as adults still trying to get attention because the oldest is being dramatic and the younger child is getting away with everything.

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My cold is worse than yours because it’s happening to me.