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Commentary:
"Being quiet in a room full of loud people is my favorite sport… because I always win the gold medal in 'The Silent Olympics'! 🥇 Shh… Sometimes it's just more fun to spectate in the chaos 💬🤫"

activity, being, favorite, full, humor, introvert, loud, people, quiet, room, social, sport

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The train announcer just said we should keep our personal belongings with us at all times but I’ve left most of mine at home.

0

2 months ago

announcer, belonging, belongings, forgetfulness, home, humor, just, keep, left, mine, personal, personal belonging, should, times, train, travel, us
There should be a good 10 hours in between waking up and having to interact with people.

0

2 months ago

good, having, hours, humor, interact, introvert, morning, people, personal, personal space, should, sleep, social, space, time, waking, waking up
Sex is cool, but have you ever received reassurance without asking for it?

0

3 months ago

asking, communication, cool, ever, humor, reassurance, relationship, sex, unsolicited, unsolicited reassurance
Dear sleep, I’m sorry we broke up this morning. I want you back!

0

2 months ago

apology, back, breakup, broke, desire, humor, i, morning, relationship, sleep, sorry, want
I offered my nephew a donut and he said “no thanks, I’m not hungry right now” and I don’t think this little guy knows how donuts work.

0

2 months ago

donut, donuts, food, guy, humor, hungry, i, kids, knows, little, misunderstanding, nephew, right, thanks, think, work
Any room can be a bathroom if you hate the person who’s house you’re in.

0

2 months ago

bathroom, hate, house, humor, person, room

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

95 shares on Snapchat this month:

Liking someone who likes you back is probably really good for your mental health.

95 shares on X this month:

Sorry I’m late. The door said PULL, but I don’t believe everything I read.

27 shares on YouTube this month:

Some people are wise; some are otherwise.

79 shares on Twitch this month:

Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.

26 shares on X this month:

Who can better express pain and grief and misery than a man with a harmonica?

49 shares on Threads this month:

There’s nothing worse than being in public and you touch something that shouldn’t be sticky and it is.

31 shares on X this month:

You can have glossy lips or you can have a cat. You can’t have both.

25 shares on TikTok this month:

My new drivers license arrived and when I opened it, I gasped. How’d they get a picture of my mother?

49 shares on Threads this month:

I lost my job at NASA Mission Control today. I misheard when they said, “It’s lunch time.”

72 shares on Threads this month:

Went jogging and came back after five minutes because I forgot something. Forgot I’m out of shape.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

Who called it America and not the fast food and the furious?

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Why the hell did they name them ‘Soldier ants’ and not ‘Combatants’?

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Solitude never hits you with unsolicited opinions.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

How does one stop eating ice cream when there’s still some in the container?

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

No parenting book prepares you for the stank of your kid’s soccer bag.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

Phones are wild… we really just sit around tapping glass all day.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Typos keep me humble. Every email is a gamble.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

I’ve reached the age where I just bought a bird bath for my backyard.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

In your 20s, you will be tempted to prove that you’re doing well. It’s important you resist performing for an audience that isn’t watching.

Trending via TikTok:

Some people get a bit strange as they get older. Not me. I’ve always been like that!

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Dad Hack: Get your teen’s attention instantly by pre-heating the oven.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I have a mental illness that makes me think that people will change their minds if I present the correct arguments with the appropriate facts and data.

Breaking via Twitch:

Lowkey terrifying when someone attractive is actually into you, omg.

Spotted on Messenger:

Babe, you’re not acting according to my delusions right now.

Live now on Threads:

She is both the storm and the shelter.

Going viral on Discord:

Some of you are out here driving like your turn signal’s free trial ended and you’re all out of blinks.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Gimme coffee or I’ll sleep amok!

Trending via YouTube:

I might not put the sparkle in your eyes, but I’ll definitely put the “WTF” wrinkles in your forehead.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Being quiet in a room full of loud people is my favorite sport.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The train announcer just said we should keep our personal belongings with us at all times but I’ve left most of mine at home.

There should be a good 10 hours in between waking up and having to interact with people.

Sex is cool, but have you ever received reassurance without asking for it?

Dear sleep, I’m sorry we broke up this morning. I want you back!

I offered my nephew a donut and he said “no thanks, I’m not hungry right now” and I don’t think this little guy knows how donuts work.

Any room can be a bathroom if you hate the person who’s house you’re in.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨