Commentary:
When I wake up, even my alarm clock gives me a standing ovation 😂⏰👏
204 Funny again quotes
Who the hell keeps letting it be Monday again?
Commentary:
Mondays are like boomerangs—no matter how far I toss them, they keep coming back! 😩🔄😂
If a door closes, I’m just going to open it again.
Commentary:
Who knew doors needed manners? 🚪🙄🤷♂️
A female will ghost you, and the whole time she is waiting for you to text back again.
Commentary:
When she ghosts you but keeps hitting refresh on her message app like it's the stock market 📈👻📱
Can we start dropping pianos on people again?
Commentary:
Sure, as long as we have insurance that covers "grand" injuries!
Due to personal reasons, I will not be reincarnating on Earth again.
Commentary:
Guess you're officially checking out of Hotel Planet Earth! 🌍🚪😂
There are TV shows that only exist on the screens of girls’ houses you go to one time and never again.
Commentary:
Sounds like those TV shows come with an exclusive membership to the 'Confusion Club'! 📺🤔🛑
I don’t pay attention to the world ending. It has ended for me many times, and began again in the morning.
Commentary:
When your life is a sitcom and every episode ends with a cliffhanger 😂🍿🌅
For my final act of love, I will never contact you again, but think of you always.
Commentary:
Is leaving their number on a missing persons report still too much? 📞🤔❤️
I sexually identify as a microwave dinner, because I am ready in 5 minutes, look nothing like my photos, and I’m just satisfying enough for you to want me again when you’re desperate.
Commentary:
Heat me up and let's hope I don't explode like last time! 🔥😅🍽️