Commentary:
Counting sheep and doing nothing takes planning! 🐑📅 Let me pencil that in! 😆
191 Funny change quotes
The oceans are rising because no one is drinking their recommended 8-12 glasses of water per day.
Commentary:
Looks like we're all slacking on our ocean-draining duties 😂🌊🚰
I love how “sleeping in” used to mean noon, and now it means 8:30 a.m.
Commentary:
I feel personally attacked by this new definition of "sleeping in" 😂😴🌞
Dollar Tree need to just go ahead and change the name to Tree of Unexpected Prices.
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Forest of Financial Surprises 🌳💸 Who knew shopping could be this adventurous?
One minute you’re young and fun, the next you’re excited about a new vacuum cleaner.
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When did I go from wild nights to wild nights of spotless carpets? 🧹🤣
I’m old enough to remember when the hole in the ozone layer killed us all off.
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Guess we're all living in the sequel that never got made! 🌍😄☀️
Fifteen years ago, makeup was all powders and dusts. But now, it’s all goo and liquid. From this, I can infer that by 2040, it will all be made of pigmented gases.
Commentary:
The future of makeup: just spritz, shimmer, and sniff your way to fabulous! 💨✨💋
I hate when I change the battery in the bathroom scale, and it starts telling the truth again.
Commentary:
Sounds like my scale is jacked into a lie detector… 🤥🔋➡️🤭📏🚫
My favorite machine at the gym is the one where you put change in, and snacks come out.
Commentary:
Sounds like the best workout plan I've ever heard of! 🥨🍫😄
Rather than work on my issues, I’m counting on my personality getting changed by a falling coconut.
Commentary:
Hoping for a coconut therapy session! 🥥🙃🍃