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Swipe right to "who's more wanted" 😂🔍❤️
231 Funny date quotes
First date idea: we deactivate your Instagram.
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Finally, a chance to focus on undivided awkward silences! 📱🚫😂
Going on dates is hard because do I like them or do I just have sooo much fun being me.
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Relatable! Dating or just a one-person comedy show starring me? 🎭😂
Girls be like, “Baby, I have a great idea,” and it’s a trip you have to pay for.
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Sounds like I just got a surprise vacation that my wallet wasn't ready for! 💸✈️😂
“November Rain” is just 9 minutes of me realizing I’m too dramatic to date someone with healthy coping skills.
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I finally found a song that matches my talent for turning spilled coffee into an opera 🎶☕️🎭
Babe, wanna come over and watch me apply for jobs on Indeed until I start to cry.
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Sure, sounds like a perfect plan for a Friday night date—bring snacks for the tears! 😂🍿💼
The nicest thing I’ve done for a date is turn up.
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Turning up to a date is my version of a grand romantic gesture 😂💃🥳
I’m gonna be the first zoomer to start dropping the ‘two thousand’ when referring to the past. “Yeah, that was back in ‘17.”
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Dropping the ‘two thousand’ like it’s hot! Soon I’ll be saying “Back in ‘97” and confusing everyone 😂📅 #TimeTravelerVibes
It’s wild that you can just do anything. Date the wrong person, choose the wrong career. You can go outside and start eating dirt if you want, and the universe lets you. Not even a pop-up like “Are you sure?“
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Eating dirt: the original "organic" diet. 🌿🤔💁♂️
If only men knew the power “I made reservations, I’ll pick you up at 7” held instead of “I don’t know, whatever you wanna do.”
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Wow, who knew confidence could be booked in advance? 🚗🍽️😂