Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

I didn’t know that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I wasn’t on that job.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

If you’re the type of person who likes to be left alone, I’m with you. Better yet, I’m not with you.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

If you want to make God laugh, inhale some helium then tell Him your plans.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

“Follow your heart,” as advice, is sort of like “abandon yourself to cognitive bias.”

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

My big 3? Yapping, napping & snacking!

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Being single: When you don’t have to wait for someone to watch the next Netflix episode.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

Golf is a great way to learn all of the new curse words your subconscious has been cooking up in the lab.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

If you think I’m funny, you should hear the voices in my head.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,657

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

The thing I hate most about my stationary bike is having to pick it up and turn it around for the return trip.

Making waves on TikTok:

Be nice to your children’s teachers. Especially elementary ones, cause kids have loose lips and that teacher has all the dirt on you.

Trending via Slack:

If you accuse me of yelling, you will start to hear yelling so you can note the difference in the future.

Trending via Instagram:

The greatest research skill you can have is being a nosy bitch who wants to find out.

Just shared via Discord:

I hope “be the light you want to see in the world” doesn’t refer to Molotov Cocktails.

Going viral on X:

Explain it to me like I’m five then do it for me like I’m one hundred.

Just landed via Telegram:

Sausage might clog my arteries, but it lubricates my soul.

Just shared via Messenger:

At my funeral, sit me up so I can see who’s talking to my man.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Everyone hates on the dentist but at least they don’t try to weigh you.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Home is where the clothes rack stands in the way.

Funny good time quotes

Funny good time quotes are the perfect way to sprinkle laughter and joy into any moment 🎉😂 Whether you’re hanging out with friends or just need a quick mood boost, these witty gems will keep the smiles coming 😄✨ Get ready to embrace the fun side of life and share some good vibes that brighten up even the dullest days! 🌟🎈

New funny good time quotes 👇

All funny good time quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on Pinterest this month:

If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.

18 shares on Pinterest this month:

Some days I feel I’m on top of the world, and other days it feels like the world is on top of me.

20 shares on Telegram this month:

My outdoor flowers are doing amazing this year because I left them at the garden center where they belong.

87 shares on Discord this month:

The unemployed urge to say I love you during a job interview.

72 shares on Facebook this month:

Life on other planets be like: “I hope those lunatics don’t discover us!”

16 shares on Snapchat this month:

They should invent friends whose schedules line up with yours.

10 shares on YouTube this month:

You’d seriously think I was wanted for murder by the way I react when someone knocks on the door.

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Me waking up: wow, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.

37 shares on Facebook this month:

I can easily spot a wolf in sheep’s clothing but this guy was dressed like my grandmother which threw me off.

65 shares on Threads this month:

My recliner and I go way back.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

What electric cars and diarrhea have in common is the fear of not making it home.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Life is pretty much just a series of awkward and embarrassing moments, separated by snacks.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite part of fall is when the mosquitoes go back to hell.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Girls are perverts when they like you.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Googling phone numbers you don’t recognize instead of actually answering the phone.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t tell me about your wild weekend. My TV remote died and I switched the batteries around, and now it’s working.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

That’s me in the corner, that’s me in the spotlight, spreading goat cheese on a bagel.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Attention to detail is so sexy, study me, baby.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,651

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

The answer is always no, I did not get enough sleep.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

How do people post 25 times a day? The only thing I can do 25 times a day is pee.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

Good morning to everyone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

One of the toughest jobs in parenting is serving the inevitable eviction notice on your kid’s pillow fort.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Give it to me straight, doc, what can I do to be healthier besides changing my entire lifestyle?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Tech bro obsessed with “storytelling,” but hasn’t read a book in the last 5 years.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

The fact that I have more clothes to sleep in than I do to go out in says a lot about who I am as a person.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

The web is a great place to befriend people who you’d never let in your house.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

I’m still repaying karmic debt from that time I was 12 and gave the middle finger to a cow at the state fair.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Snapchat:

German couples probably have less arguments because there’s an exact word for, “I’m fine, just annoyed you forgot the milk again”.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Her heart is a combination of wildflowers and wildfires, delicate, yet so fierce.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I drive like I’m immortal.

Just landed via Telegram:

Your problems are neither sexual nor spiritual, they are gastrointestinal.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

It was a tough year, but at least I did not buy a Labubu.

Making waves on Telegram:

God, on inventing the tiger: “Okay, so this is going to be some kind of cat that likes to eat Frosted Flakes.”

Just landed via Facebook:

People at the library need to learn how to be quiet. Some of us are trying to beatbox over here.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Everyone’s “the nicest guy ever” until the cops are in their backyard digging up several bodies.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Thunder is fake. It doesn’t even sync up properly with lightning. There’s some guy who waits till he sees lightning and then he presses the thunder button.

Going viral on Telegram:

I’m just impressed by how ugly I’m willing to look in public these day.

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