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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

I yelled at my cat and the other cats yelled at me. Like wow, okay, pay my mortgage then.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

A selfie only a mother could like.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Pasta is something I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

You can tell a lot about someone by the stuff you make up in your head about them.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

I like people who make eye contact like they know something I don’t.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Sometimes our greatest achievement in life is being able to survive our own thoughts.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

They’re putting me through the penny flattening machine at the zoo.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

Things can feel really overwhelming. Sometimes days or even weeks can get really hectic. Don’t forget that life is all about getting as much phone time as possible. Never lose sight of that.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Every night at bedtime I do one small ritual: six hours on my cell phone.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

Stretching is not enough. I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,953

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,953

Updated

12 seconds ago

Users Online

3,441

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Before we all die from nuclear war or a global climate crisis, can we get a little alien invasion as a treat.

Just shared via YouTube:

Oh right, like you’ve never let your kids stay lost in a corn maze just a little longer.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I miss the days when our biggest argument was whether West Coast or East Coast rap was better.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Adult peer pressure is seeing your neighbor mow his lawn.

Going viral on Messenger:

Does anyone have the number of the witch from Snow White? I need a few apples.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Europeans read a lot because their television shows suck.

Seen just now on X:

“Ooh, you’ve caught the sun.” Translation: You look like you’ve been swimming in a volcano.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Lord, they down here giving us bills every month after you already paid the price.

Seen just now on Threads:

Took the road less travelled after buying the sat nav less expensive.

Making waves on Discord:

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

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Funny instant quotes

Funny instant quotes are like little bursts of laughter 💥😂 that brighten your day in a snap! Whether you need a quick mood lift or a clever one-liner to share, these witty gems bring instant smiles 😄✨. Perfect for spicing up your chats, social posts, or just enjoying a moment of pure fun 🎉📱. Get ready to giggle and spread the joy with these hilarious quips!

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,953

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,953

Updated

12 seconds ago

Users Online

3,455

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

Bold of you to assume I have the energy to even climb a hill to die on.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

I put the mess in domestic.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

Shout out to myself for ruining my own life.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Twitter is like talking to yourself in public and some random dude walking by agrees with you.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

The purpose of life is to go insane sooner or later.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Waiting for my wife to approve my new year’s resolution of making independent decisions.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

I named my wifi “The Promised LAN” because it always connects, but occasionally leaves you wandering in the desert looking for a better signal.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

I absolutely hate being woken from a nap. There were other treadmills in the gym that dude could have used.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

I really appreciate where you’re coming from. I just wish you’d go back.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

I think during winter we should also get to work less hours in a day, just like the sun.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

Confuse your doctor by putting on rubber gloves while he does.

Just landed via WeChat:

I received a DM telling me that I’ve offended some of you. I’m truly sorry; I meant to offend all of you.

Just shared via Facebook:

Sometimes people just need you to be genuine with them, and I personally have no problem pretending to do that.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Great minds think alike, but so do stupid ones.

Just landed via Telegram:

All my bills say “Outstanding.” I guess I am good to go.

Making waves on Slack:

People who shower at night are bold enough to assume tomorrow’s even happening.

Broadcasted on X:

Humans are the only species that would cut down trees, make paper out of them, and then write “Save the Trees” on it.

Spotted on Messenger:

We should thank heaven for nipples. Without them boobs would be pointless.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

If it hurts you more than it hurts them, you are holding the taser wrong.

Spreading quickly via X:

Now that I got a library card, I’m moving differently.

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