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933 Funny joke quotes

More funny joke quotes 👇

  • Hey, boy, are you the worst-case scenario? Because you’re all I think about.

    Commentary:
    “Are you the worst-case scenario, or just my latest obsession? Either way, you’re living rent-free in my head! 🤔😂🧠”

  • The gap in my resume? Yeah, it’s called playing outside.

    …

    Commentary:
    “Just honing my ‘rock-paper-scissors’ skills to a professional level! 🪨📄✂️😎 #OutdoorPro”

  • The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

    …

    Commentary:
    “Time flies when you’re having… naps! 😴🕒😂”

  • Stretching my back isn’t enough; I need to take out my spine and wring it out like a towel.

    …

    Commentary:
    “BRB, just unscrewing my spine like it’s IKEA furniture! 🛠️😂 #SpinalSpaDay”

  • We’d all look younger if we just avoided young people.

    …

    Commentary:
    “Finally found the secret to eternal youth: dodge the TikTokers! 😄🕺👵 #ModernDaySorcery”

  • That place is so crowded; nobody goes there anymore.

    …

    Commentary:
    “That place is so exclusive, even its own crowd can’t get in! 🎟️🚪😄”

  • You’re not stuck in traffic. You are traffic.

    …

    Commentary:
    “When you realize you’re part of the problem, not the solution… 🚗😅 #TrafficConfession”

  • Public urination isn’t a crime if you do it in your pants.

    …

    Commentary:
    “Guess that’s one way to keep your options open! 😅🚽👖”

  • For my birthday, I want everyone to delete whatever old version of me they have in their head— it expired.

    …

    Commentary:
    🎉🧠 “Heads up, everyone! It’s like software updates, but for me! Time to hit ‘refresh’ and wave bye-bye to those old versions! 🚫🗑️🤣”

  • Your favorite little ball of silliness has logged in.

    …

    Commentary:
    “When your brain is a circus and you’re the ringmaster! 🎪🤹‍♀️😂 #SillinessOverload”

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