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83 Funny late quotes

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5 months ago
Share →: My kids couldn’t care less about personal hygiene unless we are running late somewhere.

Commentary:
"Apparently, my children have a secret agreement with Time itself – the more rushed we are, the more interested they become in personal hygiene 🕒🚿 #RunningLateStruggles #ParentingLife"
5 months ago
Share →: Sorry to any bands who see me yawn during their show. It’s not you, it’s just past 10pm.

Commentary:
"Apologies to the bands for the accidental 'rock n' nap' during their set 🎸💤 Who knew that bedtime and gig time could collide in such a dramatic fashion? Rock on, but please, after my bedtime! 🤘😴"
5 months ago
Share →: Apologies for the late response, instead of spending three minutes answering your email, I ignored it and felt anxious for two weeks.

Commentary:
"Who needs quick replies when you can perfect the art of procrastination and self-inflicted stress? 💌⏰😅 #ProcrastinationGameStrong"
5 months ago
Share →: A late person is never happier than when the person they’re meeting is later than them.

Commentary:
"Ah, the sweet satisfaction of a latecomer basking in the glow of not being the latest one to the party! 🕰️😄 It's the small victories in life that keep us ticking along, one tardy step at a time!"
5 months ago
Share →: I spend half the day wondering if it’s too late for coffee and the other half wondering if it’s too early for alcohol.

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal struggle between needing caffeine to function and wanting alcohol to forget you need caffeine. It's a delicate balance of timing and priorities ☕🍷 #DecisionsDecisions"
5 months ago
Share →: People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.

Commentary:
"Late to my own funeral? Please, I'd probably stop for coffee on the way! ☕️😂 Who needs to show up to a party they can't enjoy? 🎉💀 #FashionablyLateForever"
5 months ago
Share →: Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Commentary:
Ah, late 40s – the golden age of "good health for your age" accolades! 🎉 Embrace the wisdom that comes with knowing all the best stretches for back pain and the perfect anti-aging skincare routine. Just remember, at this stage, wrinkles are just laughter lines in disguise! 😉 #AgingLikeFineWine
5 months ago
Share →: I’m a yapper. I’m a napper. I’m a midnight snacker.

Commentary:
"Ah, the three noble traits of a modern human: yapping for attention, napping for survival, and sneaking snacks at night like a stealthy ninja 🗣️💤🌙🍪 #LifeGoals"
5 months ago
Share →: Ever since I was a little kid, I knew that I wanted to be late for work.

Commentary:
"Ah, the timeless ambition of always being fashionably late to the grind! ⏰😄 Who needs punctuality when you can make a stylish entrance, right? Just blame it on your 'inner child'! 😉 #FashionablyLate"
5 months ago
Share →: Naps are like gambling for the tired. You either wake up refreshed or too late to lots of angry texts.

Commentary:
"Taking a nap is like playing sleep roulette 🎲💤 Will you wake up rejuvenated and ready to conquer the world, or find yourself in a panic surrounded by angry messages? It's a risky game, but oh so tempting! Proceed with caution and maybe set an extra loud alarm just in case 😉⏰"