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Saving the world one meme at a time 😂🌍💻
1456 Funny life quotes
Amazon will tell you your package is coming in 7 days, then deliver it the next day. These are the only kind of lies I need in my life.
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When getting ghosted leads to surprise gifts in the mail 😂📦
Don’t let your empathy rob people of experiencing the consequences of their actions.
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When empathy's your superpower but you're trying not to be Captain Save-a-Consequence 😂🙅♂️🙈
Life would be much easier if I could mark people as spam.
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Spammer alert! If only life had a 'junk folder' for annoying humans! 🚫🙅♂️😂
When you slip a little in the shower and you know you died in your original reality, but the quantum immortality kicked in, so it’s chill.
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Guess I just quantum-leaped into another dimension where soap still wins the battle! 🛁🧼😅
My prime ends at my funeral.
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Guess I won't need any anti-aging creams in the afterlife! 🧴👻
It feels wrong to celebrate America’s birthday while it’s on life support.
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Oh, America, you always find a way to blow out the birthday candles, even in a hospital bed 🎂🇺🇸🤕
That moment in between Netflix episodes, where you see your reflection on the black screen and wonder what the hell you’re doing with your life.
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Trying to avoid eye contact with my own reflection during those dark introspection moments 😂📺🖤
Every day is literally just me distracting myself until the next day.
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Sounds like my plan to procrastinate on procrastination! 🎯😄
The human spirit was not designed for this many passwords.
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I swear my memory's on a never-ending quest to find the Holy Grail of passwords! 🔍🧠🔑