Funny longevity quotes

• 

  4 weeks ago

  Share →: My plan is to die young as late as possible.

  Commentary:
  "Forever young, but not a minute early! 🕒😎👴"

• 

  2 months ago

  Share →: Marriage is for life. But when that was first said, life was shorter.

  Commentary:
  Ah, the good old days when "till death do us part" had a quicker turnaround time! 💍⏳ Seems like back then, even life sentence meant something else entirely! 😂 #MarriageForLifeButWhoseLife

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: According to a recent study, women who are a little overweight live longer than men who mention it.

  Commentary:
  Well, looks like the key to longevity might involve eating that extra slice of cake 🍰 and tuning out the unsolicited opinions of certain individuals 🤷‍♂️. Remember, nothing beats the power of a confident woman with a healthy appetite! 🙌 #LongLiveTheOverweightLadies

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: My grandmother is a shining example of how you can live until 90 years of age, sustained by nothing but spite and biscuits.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs vitamins and healthy living, when you have a healthy dose of spite and biscuits to keep you going strong until 90! 🍪😂 Granny's secret recipe for longevity! #SpiteAndBiscuits"

For even more funny longevity quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny longevity quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌