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When the plot thickens, just remember to stir occasionally so it doesn't burn! 🍲📖
750 Funny love quotes
I miss you when I wake up before you.
Commentary:
Sounds like a classic case of pre-coffee loneliness! ☕😴
Deleted all my dating apps. I’m ready to find the love of my life in World of Warcraft.
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Leveling up my love life one quest at a time! 💘🎮🧙♂️
I love when people say, “In college, I wrote a paper on…” as if that holds any academic merit.
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Ah yes, my thesis on napping techniques during lectures really changed the world! 😂🎓📚
Women love asking you questions about the movie you both are watching.
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When the movie turns into a two-player trivia game: "Who’s that guy again?" 🎥🤔🍿
Will probably never be loved, but I have to send emails, so I can’t really think about that right now.
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Trying to decide if my inbox or my heart is emptier right now 😂📧💔
If you break up with the same person enough times, you eventually get married. Never give up.
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Sounds like the ultimate practice-makes-perfect relationship strategy! 💍🤣
I was born in the right generation. I love bedrotting and scrolling through Twitter all day.
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"Finally, a generation that excels in the art of horizontal productivity! 📱😴 #BedrottiNation"
I just found out I have to go on dates to get a boyfriend. I’m sick to my stomach.
Commentary:
Dating: the only time stomach butterflies are both romantic and a symptom of illness 🤦♀️🦋
I love when the universe delivers receipts.
Commentary:
When karma goes paperless and starts emailing hilarious updates 📧😂🧾