76 Funny reading quotes

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  6 months ago

  Share →: I’m currently trying not to read anything about carbohydrates after 4pm.

  Commentary:
  "Trying not to read about carbs after 4pm? That's some serious dedication to the late-night snack game! 🍟🚫 Stay strong, resist the siren call of the midnight pantry raid! 🌙💪"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Some people pack their lives so full of activities, appointments and people that I get exhausted just reading about it.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a gym when you can burn calories just from hearing about someone else's jam-packed schedule? 💪⏰🤯"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

  Commentary:
  Ah, the age-old mystery of trying to buy transcripts for audiobooks. 📜🎧 Maybe the real treasure was the words we transcribed along the way! 🤓💬 Who needs audio when you can read the novelization of the narrator's dramatic pauses? 😜📖 #TranscriptTreasureHunt

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Twitter actually is my diary, so you’re not allowed to get mad at the things I post. You’re not even supposed to be reading this. Why were you going through my stuff?

  Commentary:
  "Twitter: The Millennial's Diary 📖🔍 If you're snooping through tweets, you better buckle up for some unfiltered thoughts and a rollercoaster of emotions! 🎢😂 #TwitterDiaries #PrivacyPlease"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: My husband has reached an age where he reads the menu out loud. The whole menu. And then he has questions. Please send help.

  Commentary:
  🍽️ When your husband starts reading the menu out loud like it's the most thrilling novel in the world, you know you're in for a wild dining experience! 🙈 Who knew deciding between steak or chicken could be such an epic saga? Maybe we should start a support group for menu-reading partners! 🤣 #MenuMania

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  6 months ago

  Share →: I use subtitles so if I learn anything interesting I can say “I was reading about” instead of “I saw on an episode of Love Island”

  Commentary:
  "Using subtitles not only enhances your language skills but also upgrades your intellectual repartee level! 📺📚 Who knew Love Island could be a source of enlightenment? Keep impressing everyone with your 'I was reading about' moments! 🤓✨"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Just blocked everyone who is not in my gang so if you’re reading this, we’re robbing a bank in 12 minutes.

  Commentary:
  🤣🔒 "Looks like this gang has a strict 'No Outsiders' policy! If you aren't on the guest list, you might want to steer clear of this bank in 12 minutes… or bring some popcorn to watch the show! 💰💸 #GangGoals"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Why are poets thinking that they are the ones tortured and not those who read their poetry?

  Commentary:
  Ah, the eternal struggle between the tortured poet and the perplexed poetry reader! 📜🤔 Maybe poets are just trying to share a little slice of their angst with us, while we readers navigate the emotional rollercoaster of deciphering their verses. 🎢📝 After all, isn't it a unique kind of torture to wrestle with the ambiguity of metaphors and the depth of symbolism? Perhaps the real question is: who is truly more tortured – the poet crafting

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  6 months ago

  Share →: Not to brag, but I finished an entire book in one sitting. I’m going to need some new crayons.

  Commentary:
  Wow, that's some impressive bookworm skills you've got there! 📚🐛 Who needs fancy bookmarks when you've got a box of crayons to keep you entertained during those marathon reading sessions? 🖍️😂 Just remember: reading may be easy, but staying within the lines can be a whole different challenge! 😉🌈

• 

  6 months ago

  Share →: Sitting on the middle seat of this flight and both my seatmates are reading my book over my shoulder. Should I just start reading it aloud?

  Commentary:
  "Looks like you've got an impromptu book club at 30,000 feet! 📚✈️ Might as well turn this flight into a live audio book experience – complete with in-flight commentary and dramatic pauses! Who needs in-flight entertainment when you have captive audiences on either side? 😄 #BookClubInFlight"

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