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Commentary:
Oh, a classic case of arachnid anxiety – poor spider must be having an existential crisis now! 🕷️🏃‍♀️ Hope you left him a tiny note saying "You're not safe yet, little buddy!" 😉 #Spidernapped

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I have to work because the baby is expensive. (I’m the baby.)

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1 month ago

adulting, baby, expense, expensive, humor, i, money, responsibility, self-deprecating, work
It takes only one person in this world to make you smile. It’s called a plastic surgeon.

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2 months ago

beauty, confidence, humor, person, plastic, plastic surgeon, smile, surgeon, transformation, world
Teens be like, “I wanted to do that until you asked me to.”

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2 months ago

asked, attitude, frustration, humor, i, me, motivation, rebellious, reluctance, sarcasm, teen, teenager, teens, wanted
Come on, brain, release the happy chemicals.

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2 months ago

brain, chemicals, happy, happy chemicals, health, humor, mental, mental health, mood, motivation, release
Anyone got any good sins for someone just getting into sinning?

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2 months ago

advice, getting, getting into, good, good sin, humor, just, mischief, sin, sins, someone
You get to a certain age and realize stretching is non-negotiable.

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2 months ago

age, certain, fitness, health, humor, life, life realization, realization, realize, self-care, stretching

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on Snapchat this month:

Good morning to everyone except my baby, who already said good morning to me at 1 a.m., 3 a.m., and 5:46 a.m.

84 shares on YouTube this month:

I may look fine on the outside, but on the inside I’m hungry again.

15 shares on Pinterest this month:

Just because I’m friendly doesn’t mean I like you. It just means that I’m not rude.

68 shares on X this month:

I’m not crazy, I’m just mentally spicy.

80 shares on X this month:

Foo fighters still fighting foo.

97 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t need therapy. I need everyone who’s ever wronged me to suddenly feel a chill and not know why.

18 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Printers and computers treat each other like they broke up the night before, and you’re their mutual friend.

64 shares on Instagram this month:

If you love someone, let them sleep.

31 shares on Discord this month:

As funny as it sounds, the easiest way to get women is by having a girlfriend.

93 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m naturally funny cause my whole life is a joke.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

Watching my wife absolutely hate my daughter’s boyfriend while being nice and hospitable to him has made me question every interaction I’ve had with another human being in my life.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Friends with benefits but the benefits are you getting me an internship with your father’s network.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Donuts are beautiful creatures, and they deserve their own week on the nature channels.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

I’m at a point in life where I’m just at a point.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Can we change the phrase “Can I be frank with you” to “Can I be william with you”? I don’t want to be Frank.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Thank you for your password, now we are going to text you another password, then put that one in. Click ‘remember this computer’ so we can forget it.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Peloton guy yelling “two more, one more” but it’s me eating Cheetos.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

The sweet spot is just enough pain to know you’re alive, but not quite enough to wish you were dead.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

A treadmill minute is four times as long as a sleep minute.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

Men have nice skin because they stress out everyone but themselves.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I’m really getting tired of being a responsible adult.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

The only talent I have is spending more than I bring in.

Shared recently on TikTok:

British people be like “It’s Chewsday, innit?”

Making waves on Instagram:

I’m not saying it’s been a while, I’m just saying I completely blanked on the name of my gym.

Just landed via Threads:

Robert De Niro always looks like he just smelled a nasty fart.

Making waves on Snapchat:

If I sing “Hello” and you think of “Lionel Richie” and not “Adele,” then you can probably predict the weather with one of your knees.

Making waves on Snapchat:

‘Blinded by the Light’ is really just a song about turning the bathroom light on in the middle of the night.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Just googled “insanity” over and over but was expecting different results.

Spotted on Slack:

Being bilingual means stuttering in both languages.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I just locked eyes with a spider. But instead of killing him I ran away and hid, so he can spend the night stressing about where I am.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I have to work because the baby is expensive. (I’m the baby.)

It takes only one person in this world to make you smile. It’s called a plastic surgeon.

Teens be like, “I wanted to do that until you asked me to.”

Come on, brain, release the happy chemicals.

Anyone got any good sins for someone just getting into sinning?

You get to a certain age and realize stretching is non-negotiable.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨