I love when my Uber driver and I both shut the hell up for a full ride. Posted on2 months ago2 months ago by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image Commentary:Enjoying that premium silent service experience! ๐คซ๐๐ Related Funny Quotes ๐ค People always talk about how they love to sit in their cars for a while once they get home. Whenever I do that, my Uber driver yells at me. Hotel elevators are hell for those of us who are small-talk failures. The guy asked me, โYou just get in today too?โ and I said, โWell, no,โ then stood in silence. I had a Russian Uber driver the other day. His name was Pikup Andropov. Girl, are you an Uber driver? Because you are driving me to drink. At the self-checkout, I make small talk with myself and I wish I would just shut up.