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Commentary:
"Swimming with dolphins may break the bank, but swimming with sharks will have you diving into your savings, literally! 🦈💸 Better watch out for those loan sharks next time! 😂"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I remember when I was broke… I’m still broke, that’s why I remember so well.

0

2 months ago

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Sometimes I get really mad at myself, but not like mad enough to fight myself or anything like that.

0

2 months ago

anything, enough, fight, frustration, humor, i, irony, mad, myself, self, self-reflection, sometimes
There must be an invisible mechanism on my book. Every time I open it, my husband starts trying to talk to me.

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2 months ago

book, distraction, every, humor, husband, i, invisible, invisible mechanism, me, mechanism, open, reading, talk, time, trying
If you haven’t tried blindfold archery, you should give it a go. You don’t know what you’re missing.

0

2 months ago

activity, adventure, archery, blindfold, blindfold archery, challenge, fun, fun activity, give, humor, know, missing, new, outdoor, outdoor activity, risk, should, things, tried, trying, trying new things, uniqueness
It goes like this: You are born and then you basically do almost everything wrong. Then you die.

0

2 months ago

birth, born, death, die, everything, humor, irony, life, mistakes, wrong
A 20% discount sounds great until you realize you can’t afford the other 80%

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2 months ago

20, afford, affordability, discount, finance, great, humor, irony, realize, shopping, sounds

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

41 shares on Facebook this month:

Eating dark chocolate is practically eating vegetables.

35 shares on Snapchat this month:

How you conduct yourself when using plastic wrap is the real you.

36 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t even know what the Transformers are fighting about, to be honest.

92 shares on LinkedIn this month:

When you’re a child, you want to be a teenager. When you’re a teenager, you want to be an adult. When you’re an adult, you want to be a cat.

81 shares on YouTube this month:

Not to brag, but I just walked upstairs and remembered why.

65 shares on X this month:

Most of your problems emanate from assuming that you are intelligent. Ease into your stupidity, and be free.

74 shares on Threads this month:

I’m already spoiled… please don’t come into my life trying to unspoil me.

26 shares on Threads this month:

We just accepted air fryers and never once questioned how air fries things.

58 shares on Twitch this month:

You have one week to ask me to be your Valentine. Requests must be in the form of poetic verse written in your blood.

91 shares on Slack this month:

They should make a movie that’s good the whole way through.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

Whoever named the grapefruit when there was already a fruit named grape. Incompetent legend. I wish we could hang out.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

“You’re always sleeping!” God forbid a girl wants to be unconscious.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

My summer body has been pending for about ten years.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

It’s Friday. I ran out of small talk on Tuesday. Please leave me alone.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can’t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

Smash Mouth was so right, the years really do start coming and they don’t stop coming.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

I should’ve existed as a tree.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

A dating app that matches people by the conspiracy theories they are interested in.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

My favorite 90s skill: Uninstalling my car stereo and hiding it in my glove box in under 15 seconds.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

I don’t care if my parents are disappointed in me, I’m not impressed by them either.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Can someone please just give me a participation trophy for making it through today, please?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

The phone is the most evil screen. The computer is somewhat evil, but less so than the phone. The TV is benevolent.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

My talents are so hidden that I can’t even find them.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I hate when people say “It could be worse” because it could be better, too.

Seen just now on X:

All my small talk is done with a car horn.

Shared recently on Instagram:

People say that they want to be tall, but don’t realize how many times tall people are assaulted by spiderwebs.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

The sexiest woman you know is trying to maintain her balance between insanity and genius.

Freshly posted on X:

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If you think swimming with dolphins is expensive, you should try swimming with sharks. It cost me an arm and a leg!

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I remember when I was broke… I’m still broke, that’s why I remember so well.

Sometimes I get really mad at myself, but not like mad enough to fight myself or anything like that.

There must be an invisible mechanism on my book. Every time I open it, my husband starts trying to talk to me.

If you haven’t tried blindfold archery, you should give it a go. You don’t know what you’re missing.

It goes like this: You are born and then you basically do almost everything wrong. Then you die.

A 20% discount sounds great until you realize you can’t afford the other 80%

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨