I’m thinking of maybe killing off a few characters in the book I’m writing. That will really spice up my autobiography.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Three drinks in and that skateboard outside is looking rideable.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

I’m like … if parking too far away from the curb was a person.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Maybe her DMs haven’t been working for 2 months.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

I tell it like it is: Sometimes I watch the calls on my cell phone and just wait for it to stop ringing.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

No matter what’s going on in your life, there’s some form of potato that can make it better.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

“It can’t get any worse than this”, I lie to myself knowing it will absolutely get worse.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

That awkward moment when you have to pretend that you like the gift.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

If you’re not easily offended, why are you even online?

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

Rappers be making you feel guilty for no reason at all: “You was in the house eating dinner while I was in the streets hungry”. Like my fault, bro.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Shout out to myself for ruining my own life.