Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

No one is more stressed than someone who has seen their potential and knows they aren’t living up to it.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

My gf doesn’t really like it when I talk about my ex, which means I now have a lot of stories from college where I’m just alone for some reason.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

One day my kids will move out and discover the dishes don’t clean themselves and I feel for them. I really do.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

So heartbreaking to do laundry and realize you can’t wash the clothes you’re literally wearing right now… you will never have a completely fresh start.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Sorry, the deadline for complaints was yesterday.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

How do I get one of those fake corporate jobs where I work remotely, get paid for responding to one email a day, and have a laptop on with Outlook or whatever open?

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Problematic bed time gap relationship.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Nephew showed me his toys on FaceTime, and I had no toys to show him back. Humiliating.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

236 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,505

Funny Quotes Topics

17,570

Funny Quotes Images

15,505

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,245

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

In the 90s, you could tell who won the rap battle by who was still alive.

Making waves on TikTok:

Can anyone recommend some good places for somebody just getting into visiting?

Breaking via TikTok:

Bring me a higher love. You have 24 hours. No cops.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Hello, my voicemail is currently unavailable. To leave a message please speak slowly and clearly into the nearest toaster.

Just shared via X:

I think you misunderstood – when I said, “Let me look into it,” that meant, “I don’t know exactly how to tell you no just yet.”

Shared recently on Slack:

When I was a kid I thought shrimp cocktails had alcohol in them and I thought it was such a weird way to get drunk.

Just landed via Facebook:

Foo fighters still fighting foo.

Just shared via TikTok:

I have been alive all my life, and have not once seen a Chinese food commercial.

Just landed via TikTok:

Bro, did you seriously just forget about Dre?

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice.

I’m tired of adding ‘LOL’ to the end of my texts for sensitive people.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Maybe we should start adding 'ROFL' just to be safe, or perhaps 'LMAO' just to cover all bases. 😂🤣 #SensitiveTexting"

communication, end, humor, lol, people, sarcasm, sensitive, texts, tired

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Instagram is just Twitter for people who go outside.

0

2 months ago

comparison, humor, Instagram, just, media, outdoors, outside, people, social, social media, Twitter
This meeting could have been a pajama party.

0

2 months ago

casual, fun, humor, meeting, pajama, party, work
I refuse to learn the color coding for heart emojis. Your heart means what I want it to, and vice versa.

0

6 months ago

coding, color, color coding, communication, emoji, emoji meaning, heart, heart emoji, humor, i, learn, meaning, means, refuse, relationship, want
Getting older just means that you have to start eating all the sad foods.

0

5 months ago

age, aging, eating, food, foods, getting, getting older, humor, just, means, older, sad, sad food, start
Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

0

2 months ago

chores, dishwasher, dog, dogs, domestic, domestic chores, empty, fold, humor, laundry, never, over, people, pets, practical, practical skills, pretty, roll, sit, skills, train, training, tricks, useful
Instead of those cute mini pizzas, they should invent gigantic ones that take four people to carry.

0

2 months ago

activity, appetite, carry, craving, cute, exaggeration, food, fun, fun activity, humor, invent, joke, mini, people, pizza, should, take

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

58 shares on Twitch this month:

What if all the ancient Greek sculptures are actually victims of Medusa?

73 shares on WeChat this month:

Telling the guy next to me on the subway that I’m not even ticklish, so don’t bother trying.

37 shares on Discord this month:

Are you my pinky toe, because I will bang you on all my furniture.

21 shares on Slack this month:

I don’t always clear my calculator, but when I do, I hit both C and CE a bunch of times because I don’t know exactly what they do.

53 shares on Threads this month:

This world is extremely kind to men, so I am not.

58 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Doggy style is out cat style is in. It’s where I let you touch me until I’m satisfied then ignore you and scratch you if you try and touch me again.

15 shares on Discord this month:

I named my eraser Confidence because it gets smaller after every mistake I make.

57 shares on Instagram this month:

Twitter is the black sheep of the web, always in the corner, loudly arguing with itself.

85 shares on Reddit this month:

Googling symptoms until you cry.

90 shares on Facebook this month:

Maybe if I spend another day alone in my room then something life-changing will suddenly happen to me!?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Yesterday my husband thought he saw a cockroach in the kitchen. He sprayed and cleaned everything thoroughly. Today I’m putting the cockroach in the bathroom.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

The best cuddles are the ones where you don’t have to deflate her when you’re done.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

Don’t worry. There is still hope for the summer: the rain should get warmer soon.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Why isn’t there a mosquito that sucks fat?

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

I was walking near a construction site today and heard the foreman yell, “You’re doing a good job!” I know that was meant for me.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

I don’t see why walking is healthy. Zombies walk constantly and they look awful.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately, the movie you want to watch is unavailable on your 13 streaming services. You can rent it for $2.99 though.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

A haunted house, but it’s just all apps and websites where you got logged out but can’t remember your password.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

My cat, who has no job and pays no rent, is apparently unhappy with his fancy new cat food, and I, for some reason, am currently on my way back to the store to rectify the matter.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Does bisexual mean twice as sexual or once every other sexual?

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

Someone was saying that social media makes you miss out on your real life, but have you seen real life?

Spotted on YouTube:

Spoiler alert: Eventually you will pay a price for the way you treated people.

Spotted on Twitch:

Climbing Mount Everest looks super boring and dumb. You just walk uphill, are cold and at the brink of death. No thanks.

Just landed via Facebook:

You are my favorite dirty thought.

Seen just now on TikTok:

You will be having the worst morning of your life and then someone will start mowing their lawn.

Going viral on Reddit:

I love reading a menu. Look at all this stuff I want to eat.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Got a new Roomba but keeping the old one to see if I can get them to fight.

Spotted on YouTube:

If you have gray in your beard, you can hit it.

Just shared via Telegram:

Have you ever met someone and thought that you couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life without them?

Going viral on Threads:

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m tired of adding ‘LOL’ to the end of my texts for sensitive people.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Instagram is just Twitter for people who go outside.

This meeting could have been a pajama party.

I refuse to learn the color coding for heart emojis. Your heart means what I want it to, and vice versa.

Getting older just means that you have to start eating all the sad foods.

Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

Instead of those cute mini pizzas, they should invent gigantic ones that take four people to carry.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨