I’ve got 99 problems. I know this because I wake up in the middle of the night to review each and every one of them in great detail. Posted on2 months ago2 months ago by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image Commentary:Sounds like you've got a highly detailed nighttime drama series running in your head! πππ Related Funny Quotes π€ I’ll be honest. I can’t solve your problems. What I can do is create new, bigger problems that will make your current problems seem quaint by comparison. I always bring a glass of water to bed with me so I have something to knock over in the middle of the night. I keep all my valuables near the front door so if burglars breaks in during the night they will not wake me up. Giving every single movie I watch a five star review because itβs just such a joy to be alive. Every time I watch βThe Godfatherβ, I notice some new detail (they’re Italian???).