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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

Remember when tweets were like: party rocking with a mouse tonight. Piece of cheese gonna have a big bite.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

My dad told my sister’s new boyfriend to stand at the end of the picture so he can crop him out whenever she dumps him.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

Instagram is run by celebrities. Twitter is run by the streets.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

I was 21 when I was 15, that’s why everything’s boring now.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

It’s like no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking for them.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

“Apple Music has better sound quality!” Okay, but my entire life is on Spotify, my playlists are my children.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

Game night with the family is only fun until I lose.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

It’s really hard to come back after a poorly executed high five.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

Being an adult feels like, “If I can just get through this week, I’ll be okay,” but it’s every damn week.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

I’ll be like “it is what it is” and almost vomit from anxiety.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,465

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

I used to think “9 to 5” means a job from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

Just shared via Messenger:

I don’t think anything good will ever happen again until people feel bad about being stupid again.

Spotted on TikTok:

Life is really sucking the life out of me.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I’m going to be a printer today and just not work.

Making waves on X:

Of course I intermittently fast. That’s when I sleep.

Spotted on X:

Your twenties are for destroying and betraying yourself for nothing.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Cooking your own meals really is the best way to devote 50 hours of your life every month to save $50.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Staring at the sky for answers, nothing new.

Live now on TikTok:

“Be the bigger person” sounds too much like “accept the disrespect”.

Making waves on YouTube:

Relationship status: nobody is cheating on me so that’s pretty neat.

January-me would not believe the life I lived this year.

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January-me would not believe the life I lived this year.
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Commentary:
Guess I'm starring in my own plot twist movie this year! 🍿🎬😄

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on Pinterest this month:

If life could stop teaching me lessons, that would be great.

32 shares on Pinterest this month:

Could someone please come over here and be the adult? I’m too tired.

88 shares on YouTube this month:

Ruin a perfectly nice trip out with your child by bringing your child.

16 shares on Messenger this month:

You’ll never realize how crazy you really are until you fall in love.

52 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

23 shares on Slack this month:

Every frozen pizza is a canvas that needs an artist’s touch.

79 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m sorry I pretended I was dead when I saw you in public.

22 shares on WeChat this month:

Are you stupid, sand? You could just lay here forever on this beautiful beach, but no, you have to try with all you’ve got, to get into my shoes.

41 shares on Pinterest this month:

My kid’s superpower is knowing he won’t like a food before he even tries it.

16 shares on Threads this month:

Monday? But, I wasn’t even finished with Saturday yet.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

All cars should have a rubber bumper all the way around so we can hit each other.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Hi, I’m online. Would you like to argue for an hour about whether a hotdog is a sandwich?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

As a pigeon mother, I would never let my pigeon daughter hang around the station. That’s really no place for a young pigeon lady.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Saying “Hmmmm” when my boss walks in so he knows I’m thinking about stuff.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Cocktails can be tricky, because they taste like juice, but then the next thing you know… you can’t walk.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

If I had 50¢ for every math test I’ve failed, I’d have $7.20.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Working your entire life so you can ‘enjoy’ a couple of years when you’re close to death is the biggest scam of all time.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t have to remember details when you don’t lie.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Metallica’s “Nothing Else Matters” is my favorite song about that 5 minutes of sleep before the alarm goes off.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,307

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

I am losing touch with reality and I couldn’t be happier.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

Skinning your knee as an adult is so humiliating. That’s the toddler injury.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

No matter how busy I am, I still find time to waste on Twitter.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Do you think birds, once they get older, start people-watching?

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Do you ever wake up in the morning and you’re just like… no.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

Ever notice how many towns are named after their water tower?

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

“I’m not even close to how crazy I’m legally entitled to be.”

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

I wish my hair had as much volume as my mouth.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

It’s getting very expensive to be alive.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Just saw the fattest bird. This guy must get up early as hell.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

Trending via Telegram:

The Wi-Fi stops working for 2 minutes, and suddenly I start thinking about life.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Just stay single, y’all… I’m here apologizing for taking a nap.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Waking up early is cool until it starts feeling like you’ve had a long day at 10 a.m.

Just shared via Reddit:

I wanna be a villain so I can just saunter everywhere. The heroes are always sprinting, always running. You ever seen Darth Vader run? Hell no. And I ain’t about to either.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Giving people access to the internet was a massive mistake.

Just shared via Discord:

It may look like I’m doing nothing, but in my head I’m quite busy.

Seen just now on Messenger:

A bad relationship can ruin a good song.

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