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Commentary:
When your gratitude journal ends up serving as your way to remember milk and eggs 🥛🍳—guess even gratitude has a shopping list now! 📝🛒 Talk about a grocery run for good vibes! 😄✨

everyday, everyday life, gratitude, grocery, grocery list, humor, journal, life, list, looks, lot, sarcasm

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’ve got a soft heart and a savage mouth. I’m like a Hallmark card written by Gordon Ramsay.

0

2 months ago

card, clever, comparison, contrast, gordon, got, heart, humor, humor quote, humorous, humorous comparison, mouth, personality, personality trait, ramsay, sarcasm, savage, savage mouth, sharp, sharp tongue, soft, soft heart, tongue, trait, witty
What do you mean I never reach out? I literally thought about you.

0

2 months ago

awkwardness, friendship, humor, i, mean, miscommunication, never, reach, reaching, reaching out, social, social awkwardness, thought, thoughtfulness
The hairdresser asking me what special plans I have for the day like this wasn’t it.

0

2 months ago

asking, conversation, day, hairdresser, humor, i, me, plans, salon, special, special plans
Girl dinner, but it’s the hearts of men who wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.

0

4 months ago

answer, dating, dinner, girl, girl dinner, heart, hearts, humor, man, men, persistence, refusal, take
Unfortunately, free coffee in the office will never hit like a $9 iced latte will.

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2 months ago

9, coffee, comparison, expense, free, hit, humor, iced, iced latte, latte, luxury, never, office, preference, unfortunately
I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.

0

2 months ago

comedy, humor, i, irony, joke, jokes, know, opinion, people, stealing, worse

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

58 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Oh, to live in an apartment alone and do whatever I want.

49 shares on Discord this month:

Looking for someone whose favorite thing to do is nothing. No hiking. No adventure. Just bed rot.

52 shares on Instagram this month:

Doctor: Your body has run out of magnesium. Me: OMg.

48 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Back in the day, you used to have to listen to records backwards to discover conspiracy theories.

11 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The ideal girlfriend breaks your heart, so you go on to do great things.

97 shares on WeChat this month:

I used to think adulthood was one crisis after another. I was wrong. Multiple crises. Concurrently. All at once. All the time. Forever.

21 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m actually really peace-loving, but then there are other people.

39 shares on Twitch this month:

I wonder if my date ever found her way out of that corn maze.

97 shares on Reddit this month:

Trying to watch a superhero movie without stressing about the infrastructure damage to the city.

96 shares on Telegram this month:

I love asking 5 different people for advice then doing what I want.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Why do coffee beans smell so good, and coffee breath is like bleh?

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

You know the nap is good when it left you marks.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

People be like “bear with me” and they don’t even have a bear with them.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

People in my real life annoy me, so I come online to annoy you.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

It’s strange that we say time is a great healer when it kills 100% of people.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Can drunk people actually not control their actions or is it just an excuse to do some crazy stuff?

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

Nobody stresses a woman out more than a man who isn’t her man yet.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

Don’t let anyone treat you like a red flag, you’re the whole damn red carpet, baby.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

My toddler asked if we could go to the zoo today, and I said, “I can’t see that happening.” Then she literally left the room and came back with my glasses.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

Apparently there is a bird fight club who holds their meetings outside my window at about 5am.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Slack:

Nothing bores me like twins who don’t look alike, you should’ve just dropped later if you’re not going to participate.

Freshly posted on Discord:

What part of “hiii” do you not get? I’m in love with you.

Going viral on Facebook:

I support Bluesky in theory, but in practice, it’s like a JRPG with no bad guys.

Spotted on WeChat:

No, I’m not stressed. I just constantly grind my teeth and clench my jaw for fun.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me I’m gonna say “I’m a biter” and see how it goes.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I finally got 8 hours of sleep. Took me four days, but whatever.

Spotted on WeChat:

I just finished cleaning the house for Thanksgiving, so if you’re looking for my family they’ll be in the backyard until Thursday.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I’m so single right now that I stood on a cliff and shouted, “I love you,” and my echo replied, “I just wanna be friends.”

Shared recently on Twitch:

Shout-out to the lifeguard who recommended moving the potato to the front of my Speedo.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

This gratitude journal looks a lot like a grocery list.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I’ve got a soft heart and a savage mouth. I’m like a Hallmark card written by Gordon Ramsay.

What do you mean I never reach out? I literally thought about you.

The hairdresser asking me what special plans I have for the day like this wasn’t it.

Girl dinner, but it’s the hearts of men who wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.

Unfortunately, free coffee in the office will never hit like a $9 iced latte will.

I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨