Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

Neurodivergents will be like, ‘I’m so tired,’ and then refuse to sleep because they haven’t had enough me time after surviving the day.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

I was brought up in the wild by hyenas. Times were hard, food was scarce but we had some great laughs.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

The “Wooooooooo” track from sitcoms should play whenever you kiss someone in real life.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

I know it hurts like hell, and you don’t think you can do it, but it’s just one push-up.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I like smoke and lightning, your honor, heavy metal thunder, racing with the wind. You know that feeling I am under.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

People argue with me more in my head than they do in real life.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

Being able to notice that a celebrity unfollowed another celebrity is some seriously jobless behaviour.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Giant-sized bag of candy: I’m resealable. Me: That won’t be necessary.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

I can’t go to war, I have to water my plants.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

I don’t even know what I’d do if a sailor called me a landlubber. I’d probably lose my cool.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,568

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Twitch:

My friends put their kid to bed and then made us ice cream sundaes, which is exactly what I assumed was happening when my parents put me to bed.

Spotted on TikTok:

Everybody hates me for being a beautiful angel with a perfect soul.

Just landed via X:

The knife is my brush, the jam my paint and the toast my canvas.

Trending via Discord:

I don’t care for the term drug mule, why can’t it be a drug unicorn.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

“The heart wants what the heart wants,” I whisper as I slowly walk up to the dessert table.

Seen just now on Facebook:

A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

Shared recently on Slack:

Having Twitter is just like reading the newspaper, except the newspaper is on fire and all the writers hate you.

Live now on WeChat:

Middle-aged math is going out drinking and feeling half your age then waking up the next morning feeling twice your age.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Another day of explaining to mom that New York is big and the footage she saw wasn’t shot on my street.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

If you really wanna piss someone off when introducing them, make little finger quotation marks in the air when announcing their job title.

Welcome to college, where every single person is smarter than you, except for the three people in your group project.

2 months ago

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Commentary:
Sounds like the group project is more about survival than success! 🤓📚💡

college, every, except, group, group project, humor, people, person, project, sarcasm, single, smart, smarter, student, teamwork, three, welcome, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Going viral on X is like winning a lotto during the apocalypse.

0

2 months ago

apocalypse, lottery, social media, Twitter, viral
These days I just accept the website cookies without any protest. Website is like Grandma, I’m not gonna fight with her.

0

2 months ago

acceptance, comparison, cooky, days, fight, grandma, humor, i, just, protest, website
Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

0

2 months ago

adulthood, always, humor, irony, life, sleep, sleepy, struggle, tiredness, trying, welcome
My fight or flight response has frequent flyer miles.

0

2 months ago

anxiety, fight, flight, flyer, frequent, frequent flyer, humor, joke, response, travel
Climbing Mount Everest looks super boring and dumb. You just walk uphill, are cold and at the brink of death. No thanks.

0

2 months ago

activity, adventure, boring, climbing, cold, death, dumb, everest, fun, fun activity, just, looks, mount, Mount Everest, opinion, personal, personal opinion, risk, super, thanks, uphill, walk
I eat my first meal of the day in the afternoon, bro. Don’t ask me for advice.

0

2 months ago

advice, afternoon, ask, bro, day, eat, food, humor, i, lifestyle, me, meal, procrastination

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

11 shares on Pinterest this month:

You can always gauge my mood by the type of animal videos I share: sweet puppy videos or a cat smacking the shit out of someone.

38 shares on Twitch this month:

Just once I’d like to hear a doctor say, “Your guess is as good as mine.”

36 shares on Instagram this month:

Notice how Lorde has a song called “Tennis Court” and not “Pickleball Court”? Tired of y’all pushing that fake sport.

71 shares on Threads this month:

All the stops on the bus are pointless, except the one I’m getting off at.

53 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The fact that someone looked straight at a purple onion and named it red onion really bothers me.

100 shares on Discord this month:

Your Majesty” would be the best name for a cat.

32 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Can you imagine being a 7th grade girl and being able to see your crush’s bedroom during Zoom math class.

44 shares on Reddit this month:

I hate when you leave your phone on the side, and it brings up that red evil clock.

17 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.

76 shares on TikTok this month:

My favorite thing to do when I see people I know in public is to pretend I didn’t.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

After much deliberation, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m an overthinker.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

I kinda want a boyfriend but then where will I put my purse when I drive?

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

I have more photos of food on my phone than I do of my children.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I was born tired, and I will die tired. If I ever tell you I’m not tired, I’m probably lying.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

No pre-workout, just flashbacks of stuff I let slide.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Everyone has these three colleagues: The one who is always cold. The one who is always hungry. The one who is always tired. I am everything in one.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has copied:

My ex thinks I’m with someone else, someone else thinks I’m with my ex, everyone wonders where I am. Here I am. Just enjoying my own life.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

My superpower is keeping this couch cushion warm.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

Food gives you energy to nap more.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Spoiler alert: Monday doesn’t care about your feelings.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

Tensing up so the masseuse doesn’t win.

Going viral on TikTok:

All I want for Christmas this year is the housing market to crash, so I could buy a 5-bedroom, 4-bathroom house for $3.

Just landed via TikTok:

The lion is starting to concern himself with things he’s been trying to ignore.

Spotted on Pinterest:

The highlight of my weekends is slipping into something more comfortable and putting my feet up.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I think one of my biggest hangups in getting better at Spanish is that speaking with the correct accent makes me feel racist.

Just shared via Slack:

Most people don’t listen at all, they just wait until they can continue talking.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

What part of “I need to save money” do I not understand?

Breaking via Snapchat:

Why is Saturday over in 7 minutes and Sunday in 4 minutes, but Monday is 84 months long?

Just landed via X:

They say white people don’t have their own culture, but I just got invited to a gender reveal party for a dog, and there’s no way we appropriated that from anyone else.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Welcome to college, where every single person is smarter than you, except for the three people in your group project.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Going viral on X is like winning a lotto during the apocalypse.

These days I just accept the website cookies without any protest. Website is like Grandma, I’m not gonna fight with her.

Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

My fight or flight response has frequent flyer miles.

Climbing Mount Everest looks super boring and dumb. You just walk uphill, are cold and at the brink of death. No thanks.

I eat my first meal of the day in the afternoon, bro. Don’t ask me for advice.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨