All I’m saying is that porn gives us an unrealistic expectation of how quickly the electrician shows up.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

Just because I’m up sharing posts at 7 a.m. doesn’t mean I’m up. Don’t call my phone.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

Next on Tiny Houses: A family of 6 moves into a boat emoji.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Pasta is something I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

My therapist says I’m preoccupied with revenge. She’s going to regret that.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

The toddler refers to every baby as Baby [Name], like Baby is their formal title.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Thanksgiving ain’t been the same ever since my uncle pulled that gun out on everybody.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

The hottest thing a man can do is exactly what he said he was going to.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

Sorry, I’m late. I took a walk around the world to ease my troubled mind.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

I will never understand why our washing machines feel the need to lie about how much time is left. If you need more time, just let me know, that’s fine.