Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Men become instantly more attractive when they wear aviators; it’s science.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

Maybe the reason you haven’t found your soulmate is because you don’t have a soul.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Weight gain makes me sad. Luckily, eating cheers me right back up.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

I’m delusional but self-aware, I call that Delaware.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

Cake hits so much harder off a plastic fork.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

My handwriting got like five different fonts, depends on my mood and the pen I’m using.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

What if instead of Big Mac it was Big Matt and he came out and said hello to you?

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Men be like, “But I’m different.” Yeah, a different type of disappointment.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

I’m officially at the age where my favorite thing to do is sit down.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Dating apps never work for me because I need at least two years of friendship charged with weird sexual tension to even consider falling in love.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,475

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Milking stools only have three legs, because the cow has the udder.

Spotted on Reddit:

“You’re acting weird!” I’m not acting.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Sorry I didn’t respond to your message, I got stuck in a cloud while skydiving and lived for 72 days by drinking rain and eating birds that flew too close.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I don’t have a nervous system, I am a nervous system.

Trending via Twitch:

The lack of a pope has got me acting wild.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Due to personal reasons, I’ve decided to become your problem.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Cleaning the kitchen, but saw the laundry, so I watered a plant, and now I’m making a dentist appointment.

Spotted on YouTube:

Messed up and threw a surprise party for my minimalist friend. Now 25 of us are hiding behind the granite orb.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I shaved my legs today and it was the fastest 3lbs I’ve ever lost in my life.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Sometimes, u just gotta clean your room and apply an elaborate skincare routine, and pretend that’s equivalent to getting ur life in order.

Beds are always the coziest when it’s time to get up and you don’t want to.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Why does my bed have to play hard to get right when I have to get up? It knows I have commitment issues! 😴🛌😂

always, bed, beds, comfort, cozy, morning, reluctance, sleep, time, wake, wake up, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Roses are red. I’m going to bed.

0

2 months ago

bed, going, humor, poetry, red, relaxation, roses, roses are red, sleep
You ask for a Swedish massage and then get mad when I roll meatballs on your back.

0

2 months ago

ask, back, expectation, funny situation, humor, i, joke, mad, massage, meatball, roll, situation, surprise, Swedish, Swedish massage
Thoughts more intrusive than a 90s sitcom neighbor.

0

2 months ago

90s, comedy, humor, intrusive, neighbor, sitcom, thought, thoughts
We need a word for that weird feeling you get when you learn what a podcaster looks like.

0

2 months ago

appearance, feeling, humor, learn, learning, looks, need, podcaster, reaction, surprise, weird, weird feeling, word
Staring sadly at the empty ice cream bowl that’s too small for licking.

0

2 months ago

bowl, craving, cream, dessert, emptiness, empty, food, humor, ice, ice cream, licking, sadness, small, staring, too
If Spotify has taught me anything, it’s that I don’t know the correct lyrics to any of my favorite songs.

0

2 months ago

correct, favorite, favorite song, funny observation, humor, i, know, lyrics, me, misunderstanding, music, observation, song, songs, Spotify

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

11 shares on Twitch this month:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

65 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Descibe your boobs only using a picture of them.

87 shares on X this month:

I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.

93 shares on Pinterest this month:

“You’re overthinking this!” Bro, I have anxiety. I have no other type of thinking available.

68 shares on Telegram this month:

People who read and do research will always sound crazy to people who don’t.

13 shares on Facebook this month:

Once again, I have fallen for life’s biggest scam: being two hours early for a flight only for security to take roughly seven minutes.

26 shares on Messenger this month:

Is there a rehab for introverts who try to extrovert? Asking for a friend.

54 shares on Facebook this month:

Drive as I say, not as I drive.

38 shares on Slack this month:

Pretty cool that we all come together on Christmas and celebrate the birth of Santa.

56 shares on TikTok this month:

Thought I was a minimalist, turns out I’m just broke.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Who called it a missed phone call from your parents and not a boomer rang?

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

I can’t sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

I like driving by myself. I just played the same song 36 times.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

My cat just sneezed a bunch of times in a row and then hissed at himself. What an icon!

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

What is the morning wood equivalent for women, and why do I always have it?

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

(guy who’s not even that into you) I love you.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

He likes when I shakalaka, so, woop, there it is.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

I think the worst part about the collapse of civilization will be all those people with no way to remove their braces.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

Commenting “AI slop” on a high school acquaintance’s Instagram post of their newborn baby.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

I’m starting to think the real hell is just being stuck in an infinite loop of self-doubt and bad life choices.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

“Don’t bring a knife to a gun fight!” Okay, then explain bayonets to me.

Just landed via WeChat:

Instead of saying “Good morning,” my wife and I go straight into explanations of how badly we each slept.

Going bananas on Discord:

Men love when you ask them to explain something to you. It is considered a sign of deep respect in their culture.

Live now on WhatsApp:

You hit a couple of curbs, take out a trash can and all of a sudden it’s “you can’t drive”.

Just shared via Twitch:

It’s amazing, when it’s your birthday you really feel the love from family, friends, lovers, former dentists, yoga studios and various smootheries.

Live now on Discord:

You’re an adult. You can do what you want. Wait…You have kids? Never mind.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

The only problem I have with chocolate is that one minute it’s there and the next it’s not.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Fake laughing at work is exhausting as hell, just leave me alone, bro.

Going viral on Messenger:

The Playstation is broken and the child has noticed that I live here too.

Going bananas on Twitch:

My neighbors were up shouting all night. I could barely hear my bagpipes.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Beds are always the coziest when it’s time to get up and you don’t want to.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Roses are red. I’m going to bed.

You ask for a Swedish massage and then get mad when I roll meatballs on your back.

Thoughts more intrusive than a 90s sitcom neighbor.

We need a word for that weird feeling you get when you learn what a podcaster looks like.

Staring sadly at the empty ice cream bowl that’s too small for licking.

If Spotify has taught me anything, it’s that I don’t know the correct lyrics to any of my favorite songs.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨