Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Sorry I’m late, I was fighting for my right to party.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

The concept of warding off vampires with crosses is so interesting to me. I wonder if it applies to any other religion or if they’re allergic to just Catholicism.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

I wish I was as tired in bed at night as I am after lunch at work.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

I just heard someone refer to Texas as “Howdy Arabia” and I still haven’t stopped laughing.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

I enjoy the freedom of speech, because if you let crazy people talk, they’ll totally tell you they’re crazy.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

When a door closes in life, sometimes it’s better to grab a hammer and nails and make sure the damn thing stays shut.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

You know you’re really stressed when you start getting on your own nerves.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

When I was a little girl, I always dreamed of growing up to satisfy user needs in a way that meets business goals for transformative outcomes.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

As a parent of a teenage daughter, I would like to formally apologize to my parents for my tube-top and low-rise jeans era.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

234 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,503

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,503

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,476

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Sometimes, before bedtime, I fall asleep on the couch. It’s my little sleep appetizer… my nappetizer.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Yes, hello, I’d like to exchange my generational trauma for generational wealth, please.

Going viral on YouTube:

Whenever you feel like the world is falling apart, take a deep breath and remember you’re right.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Sex is cool, but have you ever found an academic article that fits your research topic perfectly and supports all of your claims?

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Pinterest algorithm is like a loving dad who fills the whole fridge with oranges after seeing you enjoy one.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Thank God my pets can’t talk. They simply know too much.

Live now on Snapchat:

If you’re ever wondering what to do in an uncomfortable situation, just think “What would teenage me do?” And then do the opposite of that.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Stop letting people who are going to hell bother you.

Just shared via Discord:

I’m going to need to rewatch Idiocracy to see what happens next.

Bloopers in movie credits is a lost art form.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Bring back the blooper reels! I need to see my favorite actors proving they're human, one flub at a time! 🎬😂🤦‍♂️

art, art form, bloopers, credit, credits, entertainment, film, form, humor, lost, movie, movie credit

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Stop making eye contact with me, I can’t afford a wedding right now.

0

2 months ago

afford, commitment, contact, eye, eye contact, humor, i, making, me, money, panic, relationship, right, stop, wedding
The only thing I miss all day is my bed.

0

2 months ago

bed, comfort, day, i, laziness, miss, relaxation, sleep, thing
When I was growing up I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific.

0

2 months ago

always, aspiration, childhood, growing, growing up, humor, i, lesson, life, life lesson, realization, someone, specific, wanted
Hate when you’re trying to take a nap and the dentist is all “Please open your mouth.”

0

2 months ago

appointment, dentist, frustration, hate, humor, mouth, nap, open, sleep, take, trying
Not smiling until Friday; nothing is funny this week.

0

2 months ago

attitude, Friday, Funny, humor, mood, nothing, patience, smile, smiling, week
I told all my neighbors that I have a twin, so that when I see them in public I don’t have to talk to them.

0

2 months ago

anxiety, avoidance, conversation, humor, i, neighbors, public, social, social anxiety, talk, told, twin

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

99 shares on Twitch this month:

Ragebaiting each other is flirting, btw.

40 shares on Slack this month:

“Overdressed” is a social construct created by hating girls.

10 shares on Discord this month:

Why would I spend money on the zoo when I can watch my colleagues for free?

65 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I think you would all treat me a lot better if I possessed a small amount of plutonium.

67 shares on Discord this month:

Fitness influencer: It’s important to listen to your body. Body: You’re old. And you want lasagna.

89 shares on Facebook this month:

You are closer to the street than you will ever be to any billionaire.

50 shares on Pinterest this month:

You’re never too old to shout, “Mooooo,” when you drive past some cows.

76 shares on Pinterest this month:

At a job interview: think of me as the rightful heir to the throne.

49 shares on Facebook this month:

I will never be the person this serving size suggestion wants me to be.

94 shares on Reddit this month:

My IQ used to be higher than my weight, but now I’m fat and dumb.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

I used to think “9 to 5” means a job from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

I will trust someone on Reddit from 11 years ago with my life before using ChatGPT for anything.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

One minute you’re young and fun and the next, you need a tow out of a beanbag chair.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Dating outside of your education bracket leads to misunderstandings and arguments.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

HR has told me to stop saying ‘How stupid can you be?’ to members of staff. They’re worried it’s being taken as a challenge.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Roses are red. I’m going to bed.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

If you ever ask a teen to do something and they just say “sure” without arguing, check that they haven’t been replaced with an android.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Your call is really important to us but first enjoy this clarinet number for the next seventy five minutes.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

I have good problem-solving skills, but my problem-creating skills are where I really shine.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Cake hits so much harder off a plastic fork.

Spotted on X:

Back in my day, we had to walk to the TV to change the channel. Uphill, both ways!

Just shared via Pinterest:

Becoming a dad turned me into an environmentalist. All I do now is turn off lights and yell at people who waste energy.

Just shared via Pinterest:

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

Spotted on Pinterest:

You should tell different people completely different things about yourself so that they then get into arguments when gossiping about you.

Making waves on Pinterest:

“I should’ve peed before I left,” will be my epitaph.

Just landed via Snapchat:

If I was an outlaw in the Wild West, my face would be on unwanted posters.

Trending via Pinterest:

If you are lonely, dim all the lights and put on a horror movie. You won’t feel like you are lonely any more.

Shared recently on WeChat:

The Frankfurt School?? What are you majoring in, hot dog?

Freshly posted on WeChat:

After you do your laundry, you should be allowed to get in the dryer and tumble for a little. No charge.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Bloopers in movie credits is a lost art form.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Stop making eye contact with me, I can’t afford a wedding right now.

The only thing I miss all day is my bed.

When I was growing up I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific.

Hate when you’re trying to take a nap and the dentist is all “Please open your mouth.”

Not smiling until Friday; nothing is funny this week.

I told all my neighbors that I have a twin, so that when I see them in public I don’t have to talk to them.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨