Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: If you see me out in public but we haven’t talked since high school, let’s keep it that way.

Commentary:
"Ah, the delicate dance of avoiding awkward high school reunions in the wild 🙈 Let's maintain that perfect balance of nostalgia and peace by pretending we're still in homeroom together but without the small talk, shall we? 🕺💬 #NoTimeForAwkwardCatchingUp"
6 months ago
Share →: My robot vacuum and I are cut from the same cloth. When we see a line of dirt on the kitchen floor, we just spin around and go the other way.

Commentary:
Ah, the dynamic duo of the spin masters! 🤖💃 No need to tackle obstacles head-on when you can pirouette away from them in style! Who knew cleaning could be so chic and effortless? 💁‍♂️🌀 #DirtDodgers #CleaningComedy
6 months ago
Share →: The most avoided species of shark is the Loan.

Commentary:
Oh, the Loan shark, the ultimate predator of finances! 💸🦈 Watch out for those interest rates lurking in the waters of debt, ready to strike when you least expect it. Remember, always read the fine print before diving into those murky financial waters! 🌊💼
6 months ago
Share →: “No idea” doesn’t mean I don’t know the answer. I just don’t want to have a conversation.

Commentary:
"Oh, the classic 'no idea' defense strategy – a stellar way to avoid small talk and awkward social interactions without coming off as completely clueless! 😏🤷‍♂️ Who knew being vague could be such a power move?💡"
6 months ago
Share →: Saw someone from high school. She said she hadn’t seen me in years. That’s likely because I’d always seen her first.

Commentary:
Sounds like you were the official "hide and seek" champion of your high school years! 🏆 It's all fun and games until someone gets spotted first! 🔍😄
6 months ago
Share →: There are two types of people in politics. Avoid them.

Commentary:
"Ah, politics – the land of drama queens and power-hungry villains. 🕵️‍♂️ Best to steer clear and leave them to their own reality TV show. 📺 Who needs that kind of entertainment in their life? 🙅‍♂️"
6 months ago
Share →: Of course I do cardio. It’s called running from my problems.

Commentary:
🏃‍♂️💨 "Who needs a gym membership when you can get a workout sprinting away from responsibilities? 😂 Avoiding problems like a pro athlete! Go, runner, go!"
6 months ago
Share →: Them: OMG, I haven’t seen you in so long. Me: Yeah, that was on purpose.

Commentary:
🤣 "Them: OMG, I haven’t seen you in so long. Me: Yeah, that was on purpose. Let's just say 'out of sight, out of mind' isn't just an expression for me, it's a lifestyle choice! 🙈"
6 months ago
Share →: No, I won’t be attending your seance, I barely want to talk to the living.

Commentary:
"Sorry, I have a strict 'no ghost chat' policy 🚫👻 Who has time for spirits when dealing with the drama of the living? 😂 #GhostDialIgnore"
6 months ago
Share →: I told all my neighbors that I have a twin, so that when I see them in public I don’t have to talk to them.

Commentary:
"Sharing a twin rumor with your neighbors just to avoid small talk – talk about using sibling leverage! 😂👯‍♂️ Who knew having a doppelgänger could come in so handy for introverts?"