Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Remember when you could lay in one position for hours, now you have to rotate like a rotisserie chicken every 15 minutes or a hip hurts.

Commentary:
Ah, the glorious days of youth when you could blissfully sprawl out like a starfish🌟 Now it's all about strategic maneuvers, shifting like a game of hip-saving chess every quarter hour ⏰ Who knew we'd all turn into human rotisserie chickens with age? 🍗😂 #AdultingStruggles
6 months ago
Share →: Chickens only make one sound, because they can’t think outside the bawks.

Commentary:
"Why did the chicken stay silent during the brainstorming session? 🐔 Because it couldn't think outside the bawks! 🤣 Maybe it just needed to hatch a better idea! 🐣💡"
6 months ago
Share →: If chickens knew how good they tasted, they would understand.

Commentary:
"Oh, the irony of it all! 🐔😋 If only chickens were in on the secret of their deliciousness, maybe they'd have a little more sympathy for our poultry-loving ways. 🍗😅 Oh well, ignorance is bliss, right?"
6 months ago
Share →: Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

Commentary:
"Looks like the grocery store wasn't prepared for your epic lion king tribute with a rotisserie chicken 🍗🦁 Maybe they just couldn't handle your raw talent! Time to find a new stage for your poultry performances 😄🛒 #HakunaMaTatastegreat"
6 months ago
Share →: I toss and turn in bed all night like a beautiful rotisserie chicken.

Commentary:
"Who needs beauty sleep when you can have a golden, aromatic glow instead? 🍗✨ Sweet dreams, delicious rotisserie chicken! Just make sure not to overcook yourself 😉🔥"
6 months ago
Share →: Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Commentary:
"Seems like a classic case of ‘egg-citing’ family reunion gone wrong 🐔🍳 Better egg-splain yourself before the chickens start a coop d'état! 😜"
6 months ago
Share →: I have an emotional support chicken roasting in the oven.

Commentary:
"Looks like that chicken is doing double duty today – supporting you emotionally and filling your belly! 🐔🥘 Hopefully it's seasoned with love and understanding! 😂"
6 months ago
Share →: If a vegetarian who eats fish is a pescatarian, is a vegetarian who eats chicken called a poultrygeist?

Commentary:
"Ah, the mysterious case of the poultrygeist! 👻🐔 Can you imagine a ghostly chicken haunting the dinner table of a vegetarian? Better watch out for those clucking spirits! 🍗😱"
6 months ago
Share →: I didn’t go to the Carribean, my tan is from standing in front of the rotisserie chicken at Costco.

Commentary:
"Well, who needs a beach when you've got Costco's rotisserie chicken as your personal sun lamp? 🌞🍗 Who needs a tropical vacation when you can have a golden glow and a full stomach, all in one trip to the store? 😂 #CostcoChic"
6 months ago
Share →: Sometimes, in the middle of eating a rotisserie chicken, I ask myself “did I just run a red light?”

Commentary:
"Who needs a rearview mirror when you can keep an eye on the road AND your chicken at the same time! 🚦🍗 #MultitaskingGoals"