56 Funny household quotes

• It’s unfortunate that scrubbing the floors on your hands and knees is so much more effective than mopping.

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  5 days ago

  chore, cleaning, cleaning effectiveness, effective, effectiveness, floor, floor cleaning, funny observation, hands, hands and knees, household, household chore, knees, mop, mopping, much, observation, scrub, unfortunate

• You can do laundry every day and still be behind on laundry.

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  6 days ago

  behind, chore, daily, daily task, day, every, household, humor, laundry, procrastination, still, task

• Just waiting for my laundry to be done so I can pop it in the dryer and forget about it again.

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  6 days ago

  again, chore, done, dryer, forget, forgetfulness, household, household chore, humor, i, just, laundry, pop, procrastination, waiting

• Telemarketer: “Hello, am I speaking to the head of the household?” Me, handing the phone to my cat: “It’s for you.”

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  6 days ago

  am, call, cat, conversation, head, hello, household, humor, i, joke, me, phone, phone call, prank, speaking, telemarketer

• Based on the amount of laundry I wash each week, I’m starting to think there are people who live here that I haven’t met yet.

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  7 days ago

  amount, chore, funny observation, here, household, housemate, humor, i, laundry, live, living, living situation, met, mystery, observation, people, situation, starting, think, wash, washing, week

• Have you ever just restarted the dryer because you didn’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

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  7 days ago

  chore, clothes, dryer, ever, feel, folding, household, household chore, just, laundry, procrastination, restart

• Free marriage tip: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she is mowing the lawn.

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  7 days ago

  ask, communication, dinner, free, household, humor, lawn, lawn mower, marriage, mower, mowing, multitasking, ready, relationship, tip, while, wife

• You don’t do laundry once a week. You do it constantly, endlessly, forever—until you die.

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  1 week ago

  chore, daily, daily life, die, endless, endless task, household, humor, laundry, life, once, task, week

• Selling porn is gross, but selling food and small household items is grocer.

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  1 week ago

  food, grocer, gross, household, household item, humor, item, items, porn, pun, selling, small, wordplay

• My husband and I were doing yard work, but I started a fight so I could storm off into the air conditioning.

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  1 week ago

  air, air conditioning, chore, conditioning, doing, fight, household, household chore, humor, husband, i, relationship, storm, storm off, work, yard, yard work

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