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"Botox: when you're not competing with time, just the other Botox club members! 😆💉👵✨"
1654 Funny joke quotes
Sorry, babe, can’t right now. The group chat is active, and I’m trying to get my joke in before they change topics.
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Trying to drop my comedy masterpiece before it gets buried in GIFs 😂🤣🎤
The only thing faster than an escalator is an escasooner.
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Looks like we're all aboard the USS Speedy Steps to destination 'Next Floor'! 🚀🤣
Americans are funny, man. “It’s 72 degrees outside.” Bro, I don’t speak oven.
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Sounds like a recipe for confusion! 😂🥵🔄
If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.
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Leg day just became my favorite day of the week! 💪👀😂
It’s leg day. No, not at the gym, dummy. I’m shaving them.
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When leg day turns into a smooth operator session 😆🪒🥳
If you smoke pot in Saudi Arabia, you risk getting stoned.
Risky business over there! You might just get double the high! 😄🚬🪨
I lied, there’s no sex. Can you tell me a bedtime story?
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Who needs bedtime action when you can have bedtime fiction? 🛌📖😴
If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.
Commentary:
That sounds like a gruelling test of endurance—don't forget to carbo-load with some donuts 🍩🏃♂️😴!
My father didn’t want kids, so he had two kids, which was the equivalent of zero kids at the time.
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Dad-math strikes again: 2 kids = 0 kids. 🤔🧮👶👶